


A Promise

by Redandblackassassin



Category: Avengers, Doctor Strange (2016), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Emotionally conflicted Loki, F/M, Fluff, M/M, Occasional angst, Subtle WandaNat
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-08
Updated: 2019-08-23
Packaged: 2020-01-07 01:41:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 22,155
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18400562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Redandblackassassin/pseuds/Redandblackassassin
Summary: It's hard to make a promise when you're the God of Lies.They've given into their feelings, said those three words and Loki has promised to never die on him. Can he keep that promise? What will their future be like?





	1. "I promise."

“You have to promise me something, Loki,” Stephen said, brushing an ebony strand of the God’s hair from his eyes. Loki’s lips pursed slightly as he took a minute to think, to contemplate what this promise could be.

  
“Yes?” He eventually replied, trying to not hide weakness in his voice. Promises usually ended up broken in his life, always got him hurt. Promises were hard when you were the God of Lies.

  
“I need you to promise me not to die again,” the doctor replied, making Loki actually scoff.

  
“Stephen, love, you realise how difficult that promise could prove? There are so many who want to kill me. So many—“

  
“But together we can make sure that they can’t get close to you,” Stephen said, gripping Loki’s angular chin between those scarred fingers that Loki loved, despite how marred they were. “If we decide to have the future that we planned, Loki, then I need to know that you won’t leave me. Yes, I know you won’t just leave,” he added when Loki shot him a look, “I mean death. You can’t leave me.” Loki furrowed his dark brows, wondering why Stephen was asking such a thing. Who left him? Yes, they had planned a future, one of which he...liked the sound of. Settling down was never something the God of Mischief had wanted. Casual sex? Yes, but never feelings that strayed towards love. Not until he had met Stephen, at least.

Loki slowly took Stephen’s hand away from his chin, only to grip the shaking hands in his strong ones and press them to his lips. The doctor released a shaky breath, seemingly terrified of Loki’s response. The fear was unlike the great Sorcerer Supreme. The man who defeated Dormamu, defeated death again and again.

  
“I promise,” Loki murmured, flicking his emerald gaze onto Stephen. Another breath was released raggedly from the doctor and he nodded, the vulnerability still very evident on his face. Loki guessed he too was showing vulnerability, as he mentally promised himself to stay with Stephen until their lifetime was over. He’d remembered telling Thor how a human’s life was a God’s heartbeat, and that he’d never be ready for the end of the life...but this was something he would risk for Stephen. To wake up every morning to the smell of coffee and the distant humming of the sorcerer. To the shared cold showers that Stephen put up with because Loki couldn’t handle the heat. The nights under the covers, where Loki explored the lines of Stephen under those robes. These were all small things that he had found himself enjoying over the months they had been together.

“I promise,” Loki repeated, louder and firmer. He would protect his life, just so he could share it with Stephen.

  
The Sorcerer Supreme nodded, taking his hand away from Loki’s, only so he could lean forward and press his lips to Loki’s in the softest of kisses. Their first kisses were a clash of tongues and teeth and lips, but recently, they had been softer, subtly saying those three words that the two of them only said now and then.

  
I love you.


	2. "For better or for worse?"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Soft moments between our magical couple, a feast and a secret.

A month after Loki had made his promise their lives had turned to something normal and domestic, something Stephen never expected to come of their relationship. Then again, he hadn’t expected a relationship in the first place.

Loki shifted between both his male and female forms, which was never a problem to Stephen...especially not in between the sheets. Stephen remembered the first time with female Loki, the strands of her dark hair sprawled across his chest, her skin silky against his as she-

“Stephen, what is four letter word to describe an annoying person?” Loki asked innocently, trailing the sorcerer straight out of his dirty mind. He chewed on the top of a pen, looking like a human and not the God and prince he was. He’d forgotten that Loki sat opposite him at the kitchen table, filling out some crossword puzzle on a newspaper that Wong bought earlier that morning.

Stephen furrowed his brows and thought for a moment. “Nark? Gall?” He suggested. Seeing the Prince of Asgard with his head stuck in a newspaper was the last thing he thought he’d ever see. The god’s lips pursed as he stared at the newspaper, before ultimately writing ‘Thor’ in the space and setting the newspaper down. 

“What are you doing today?” He asked, sounding bored.

Stephen shrugged. “Aliens from another dimension aren’t attacking, the Avengers don’t need me…” He said lazily, “So I guess you’re stuck with me today.”                           

“Oh ew, sounds like a horrid day,” Loki teased, a smile playing on his lips. Stephen reached his scarred hand forward, offering it on the table for Loki. To his delight, the God slid his hand into Stephen’s, stroking over the surgical scars. Thankfully, Loki was able to numb the pains and aches in Stephen’s hands, but only temporarily. Still, Stephen was thankful for the moments of relief, when he wasn’t reminded of the car crash.

“What shall we do today, hm?” Stephen asked, his voice coming out as a purr. His lover quirked a brow, just as he reached forward, across the table.                                  

 “Don’t you mean who you should do today, darling Stephen?” Loki replied, but before their lips could meet a, “Sorcerer!” chimed through the sanctum.

Quickly, Loki sat down with a scowl on his face, but it plastered to a sickly sweet smile as he looked up at his brother. “Don’t you know how to politely enter a home, Thor?” He asked, but Thor wasn’t phased. He merely shrugged, greeting them as he sat down. He took a swing of Loki’s coffee. His brother scowled, but said nothing that would cause a fight. 

“Why are you here, can I ask?” Stephen asked Thor, then gave Loki a look. Despite being together with Loki for a while now, he still got ridiculously intimidated around his brother. Could anyone blame him, considering the brother was Thor Odinson? 

“Can’t I visit my brother and his boyfriend without a reason?” Again, Loki and Stephen looked at each other, and after a moment, “...Okay fine. There’s going to be a feast in New Asgard tomorrow night and both of your appearances would be greatly welcomed,” Thor said, smiling. Loki’s nose scrunched up in distaste. 

“So I can witness you and the rest of the Asgardians eat like barbarians? No thanks,” He said, then snatched his coffee back and sipped on it. Stephen has introduced him to the bean juice a few months ago, and the god was most definitely addicted now.

“I thought it would be a good opportunity for Stephen to see our culture and the New Asgard,” Thor interjected, looking over at the sorcerer.

“Stephen has seen New Asgard plenty of times.”

“Yeah, _your_ room in New Asgard, brother.”

To that, Loki’s cheeks had stained a crimson colour, and Stephen coughed. Well then. “Maybe it would be, er, enjoyable,” He replied, making Loki’s eyes light up in shock and Thor’s mouth break into a wide smile which he smugly pointed to his brother.

* * *

 

“Do you truly want to go to the feast?” Loki asked, sprawled over Stephen’s chest that night. They sat on the sofa, watching some serial killer documentary Loki had been interested in. Stephen shrugged.

“Thor seemed excited about the idea of us going. Why not?” Loki murmured something Stephen couldn’t quite register, then laid his head back down on the sorcerer’s chest.

“Alright then, we will go.” 

* * *

 

And they did, to Thor’s delight. Loki had shifted into a female, wearing a green dress designed by an Asgardian seamstress. It accentuated her curves, making her look like the goddess she was. Stephen, trying to impress Thor, wore a suit. The tie was green, matching Loki’s dress perfectly. Of course nobody else wore a suit, but both Loki and Thor had failed to tell the Sorcerer Supreme that. Still, his lover had gushed over how he looked...as did a few Asgardian females. The night was successful, especially when Stephen found Bruce Banner at said feast. Whilst Loki had disappeared the sorcerer talked to Bruce, asking him about the well-being of the Avengers and himself. He also made a new friend; the Valkyrie called Brunnhilde. She was drunk, but that merely produced a few laughs between the trio. Later on, when people were heading off to their rooms, Stephen searched for Loki.

He found her on a balcony, staring out to the night. The waves crashing against the nearby cliff made the moment peaceful, almost romantic. “Hi you,” Stephen said, coming up behind the female. If he had surprised her, she didn’t show it.

“Hey,” she whispered, her usually sensual voice soft.

“What’s up? I lost you for most of the night,” He teased, wrapping his arm around her body. His marred fingers brushed over her stomach, but she quickly laced them with hers.

“I was with Thor, then came out here to get some air,” She replied, then turned and gazed up at him. Stephen kissed her softly, once, then tucked her head under his chin. Usually soft moments like these didn’t last, Loki usually found a way to distract them or pulled away...but she stayed still against him, letting Stephen hold her.

“Are you alright?” He asked, sensing a forlorn mood. Like he expected, she pulled away and shook her head.

“Yup, I’m just shocked you actually seemed to enjoy the night,” she replied in accusation, “feasts are never polite things. Thor is a drunken oaf right now.”

Stephen shrugged. “You forget that I’ve tolerated the lavish parties of Tony Stark,” he teased, making her playfully roll her eyes, “and Thor is always so happy when drunk. We can’t complain.”

“I threw him out of a window, you know,” she said bluntly, innocently looking up at him.

Stephen actually laughed at that, the lack of regret in her tone. “Thor?”

Loki shook her head, but Stephen still presumed that Loki had thrown Thor out of a window considering their childhood.

“No, Tony Stark.”

“Why am I not surprised?”

“Because it’s me.”

“Because it’s you,” Stephen repeated, looking into her emerald eyes. That seemed to be the end of the conversation, as Loki has practically hauled him up to her bedroom.

* * *

 

“Hey. Can we talk? ” She breathed, finding Stephen at the sanctum’s infamous window. Levi, the cloak, clung to his shoulders, drifting down elegantly. He looked so handsome it make Loki’s heart ache. She often wondered if she deserved such a being, but her arrogance also made her believe that Stephen was blessed to have her. They were blessed to have each other.

It had been days since the feast, since the night Loki’s life had completely changed; for better or for worse? She couldn’t tell. She just knew that she had to eventually tell Stephen her new news and pray that he wouldn’t react harshly. Loki had never felt this nervous before, even in the presence of Odin when he was mad. Sometimes she hated it, the feelings that Stephen caused her to feel every single day. The weakness. The vulnerability. For years she had been taught to reel in emotion, to not let people know she actually felt, and then Stephen came along and changed everything. Even becoming closer and friendlier with her brother was a huge change. Immediately, his eyes wandered around her body, searching for any damage that could potentially break the promise Loki promised.

“Are you hurt? Is there something wrong-”

“I’m fine,” she said quickly, almost snapping at him, then calmed down and sighed, “I’m fine.”

“Are you sure? You’ve been acting so differently these past few days, ever since the feast.” Shit, she didn’t realise that her demeanour had changed.

Loki looked up at him, biting her lower lip. Stephen cupped her chin in a scarred hand and tilted it up towards him. “Tell me,” He murmured, sensing the female had something to say. For the first time, Loki seemed...nervous. Slowly she took his hand away from her chin, lowering it to her stomach. Firmly, she pressed his hand there, letting him connect the dots. It took him a moment, but when it clicked, his light blue eyes widened in shock.

“You’re-” She nodded.

“Loki, say it.” He needed to hear the words come out of her mouth, to make the situation more real and-

“I’m pregnant.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...whoops? It'll be updated within the next few days ;)
> 
> A comment from you would be greatly appreciated!


	3. "We can handle this."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A certain brother finds out, more Strangefrost fluff and a battle.

Stephen stayed silent for a few moments, unknowingly adding to Loki’s anxiety. Perhaps it was surprising, but she had never been pregnant before, never brought up a child. Perhaps because she had been too independent growing up, not wanting a child to ever get in her way. Now...she didn’t know how to feel. Yes, she was independent...but she also had settled with someone she loved. She had let herself be somewhat dependant on the sorcerer.

“You’re positive?” He asked, his voice breaking through the silence.

“I wouldn’t tell you if I wasn’t completely sure, Stephen,” Loki replied, giving him a look. He released a shaky breath, trying to comprehend this. He was going to be a _father_. The father of a prince or princess of Asgard. His mind went back to the feast. Loki’s dismal moods. Her taking his hands away from her stomach.

“You found out the night of the feast,” he said, not a question. She slowly nodded, clearing her throat.

“Yes. I’ve had this weird taste in my mouth for some time, as if I had been sucking on copper coins you mortals use. Then I felt sick and dizzy, especially on the night of the feast. Initially I thought it was just the disgusting way Asgardians eat that was making me feel sick...but it bothered me all night. The not knowing what was wrong with me. That’s why I disappeared-”

“To take a pregnancy test.”

Loki nodded, wrapping her arms around herself. Feeling this vulnerable felt gross and she didn’t like it. “Yes,” she repeated, wincing as she looked up at him. “Do you hate me?”

Stephen actually scoffed, then cupped her oval face in his shaky hands. “No,” he said, his voice full of confidence, “I don’t think I could ever hate you. Besides, this happened because of me too,” he frowned, “Loki, stop looking at me like that. I’m happy.”

She blinked at him. Once. Twice.

“Happy?!”

He nodded, stroking her flushed cheeks with gentle fingertips. To his bewilderment, she let him do so without grumbling about it. Perhaps she needed the comfort. “Yes, Loki. I’m happy. Ever since you made that promise I knew that we were serious, and that I loved you enough to want a future with you. That future,” he gave her stomach a pointed look, “came early, a shock to both of us...but this is good. We can handle this.”

Loki actually smiled, letting her head lean against his hands. “I guess it is...but that does not mean that you treat me like an invalid. I am a goddess, a princess of Asgard, and if you try and coddle me like a child then I swear I will kick you square in the-”

“Yeah, yeah I get it,” He teased, then kissed her forehead before pulling away.

The fact that she was carrying his child gave him a sort of happiness he had never felt before. Loki released a breath, giving him another sheepish smile that made his heart warm.

The next step of their future began now.

* * *

 

 “When will we tell Thor?” Stephen asked, rubbing Loki’s shins and calves as she sprawled them over the sorcerer’s lap. Her being pregnant meant that he couldn’t ‘baby’ her...but she was rather content to be spoilt like the princess she was.

She finished off the smore that Stephen made her, wiping chocolate off her lips before she spoke. “I dunno. When would you like to tell my brother that you knocked up his lovely little sister?” She asked sweetly, making his face completely pale. Loki let out a cackle, then gently shoved his arm with a delicate foot. “I’m kidding, darling. You know he’ll be happy about having a little prince or princess in New Asgard.” Perhaps the Valkyrie herself would enjoy a stumbling little baby. Loki laid down properly, placing her hands on her stomach.

“Maybe the next time we see him,” Stephen suggested, hoping that Loki would actually be right.

Sensing nervousness, Loki sighed and sat up, placing herself on his lap. “Everything will turn out fine, Stephen. You said it yourself, this is just our future brought forward,” She said, her voice soft only for him. He’d been tempted to look into their future, see what it held for them...but, for the first time in a while, not knowing was exciting to him. Besides, he could never tell his lover what he found out. That wouldn’t be fair.

He reached forward, placing his hands on her flat stomach. “Boy or girl?”

She snorted. “It’s a little too soon to think of that, don’t you think darling?”

Stephen shrugged. “There’s no harm in premature thoughts.”

Loki thought for a moment, tracing her fingers over the folds of his extravagant tunic. He’d been training students this morning, leaving Loki in the bed early- much to her displeasure. Still, he made it up to her when he came back by sneaking into her shower.

“I don’t care what gender the baby holds, as long as they are healthy,” Loki replied, but eventually added, “Maybe a prince. What about you?”

“Mmh, maybe a boy too. I don't really care either. Do you think they will have magic?”

Loki rolled her eyes. “We are two of the most _powerful_ sorcerers in the whole of the Nine Realms and you ask if our baby will have magic?” She asked, quirking a dark brow at the man. Okay, she had a point.

“I’ll take that as a yes, then,” he murmured, absently stroking her stomach.

“Speaking of power...will I not see your male form for nine months?” He asked, curious. He knew of Loki’s abilities, but didn’t know too much about it. With a smile and a faint flash of emerald, Stephen found Loki’s male form on his lap, grinning like a cat.

“I can remain in my male form for an hour at the most,” he murmured, biting his lip. Stephen pulled him forward, taking the god’s lips between his teeth, tugging it. Suddenly, Loki found himself sprawled over the sofa, legs parted with Stephen between them.

“Think that’s enough time?” Stephen purred.

Loki’s response was to haul Stephen closer, pressing their lips together.

 

* * *

 

 

 A week later, Stephen found himself in New Asgard, thoroughly exploring the place for the first time. It wasn't like how Loki has described the original Asgard, but he assumed they did the best they could with what they had. The Avengers had helped, especially Tony Stark. The Black Widow had helped Asgardian orphans, which had shocked Stephen considering her past.

Stephen imagined a child running around the halls, causing mischief like his mother with the whole of Asgard wrapped around his little chubby finger. It seemed like the perfect dream, a dream which he didn't think would ever come true when he became the Sorcerer Supreme. And now, in nine months, him and Loki Laufeyson would be a family.

“What do I owe the pleasure, dear sister?” Thor asked as they walked along. Earlier they'd had a late breakfast with Thor, where Loki had screwed her nose up at strawberries.

Loki, draped in a the feminine version of her usual Asgardian attire, had her hands laced at the front of her, elegantly walking between the two men. She definitely looked different to early this morning, when she had her head practically down the toilet bowl as she threw up. Like every morning this past week, Stephen was there, holding back her hair and manifesting a glass of water that never seemed to end.

“Can’t a sister visit her dear brother?” She asked innocently, making Thor snort.

“There always is a reason behind everything you do, Loki,” he replied, making Loki grin. He knew his sister well.

“True. How are your darling Avengers doing?” She asked. Was she genuinely curious, or procrastinating?

“They are well, Loki. Pepper had her child, a girl. They called her Morgan, Banner told me,” Thor said. Stephen knew that, since Tony Stark had proudly announced it in the ‘Superhero’ group chat. He was happy for the Stark, after all he had been through. 

“That’s...pleasant,” she breathed, biting her lip for a moment. “If there were a child around here, Thor, how would you respond?” Thor suddenly stopped, grabbing Loki’s wrist. Despite that, Thor had a goofy smile on his face.

“Are you saying what I think you are?” He asked, looking between the two sorcerers.

She rolled her eyes at him. “What else could I be saying, brother? I'm pregnant."

At that, Thor let go of his sister and walked up to Stephen, narrowing his duo-coloured eyes. Stephen gulped. “If you hurt her, I will-”

“I get it, Thor. You know I won’t do anything to harm Loki,” Stephen replied, slightly nervous a fight would break out between them. Instead, to his shock, the God of Thunder smiled and clapped him on the back.

“Well, then Congratulations to you two,” he chirped, hauling Loki into his arms. She groaned, but still wrapped her arms around his body. “Thank you, Thor,” she said, pulling away from him a moment later.

She crossed her arms, looking between the two men. “Shall we leave, Stephen? I want one of those wrappy things you mortals eat,” she said.

“You mean a burrito?”

“Exactly, the wrappy thing. Farewell, Thor, and if you tell anyone of my news before I do I will not hesitate to turn you into a frog,” she said sweetly, kissing her brother’s cheek.

Once Stephen had said goodbye, he used his sling ring to create a portal, which him and Loki slipped through.

 

* * *

 

 

Stephen wiped sauce from Loki’s chin, amused at how she ate the burrito. They had decided to sit in the restaurant, probably so Loki could convince Stephen to get a dessert for her. “That went better than I thought it would,” Stephen said, picking at his own rice bowl.

Loki hummed out something incoherent, then finished what was in her mouth. “Thor is a secret softie for children and anything else that is cute,” Loki responded, as if she had expected the reaction from her brother, “Well, as long as he can give the child back. Thor doesn’t seem the type for settling down and having kids.”

“You didn’t seem the type either, Loki,” he challenged.

Loki shrugged. “That was until I met the person who changed my mind on that.”

Stephen smiled, deciding that he would do anything he could to keep his girlfriend and their unborn baby safe, for them to have peace in their futures.

 

* * *

 

The peace didn’t last long for Stephen as he found himself in the centre of New York, with alien-like creatures attacking from every angle. Red flames flashed from the Scarlet Witch, the clang of metal from the Captain’s vibranium shield, but there were no green wisps or illusions from his lover. No, Stephen had forced Loki to stay at home, where she would be safe. Loki was furious with him, threw numerous pillows in an attempt to distract him. She could have used an illusion, could have blasted him with her magic...but she hadn’t. Even in her anger, Loki could never harm the one she loved.

Stephen hit at the alien creatures with his magic, watching as they exploded into lumps of disgusting gloop. It coated the streets of New York, which Stephen guessed was a good thing on their part...but he couldn’t help but think of the mess to be cleaned up. The fight lasted most of the night, until either the aliens turned into messes on the streets, or they returned back to their planet through a green, droopy portal.

“Do you think they’ll come back?” asked Wanda, still looking at where the portal used to be. Steve clasped the shield tighter to his arm, as if more aliens were to pop out and show their asses again.

“If they know better, they wouldn’t,” replied the Black Widow. Wanda wrapped an arm around Natasha, who was limping, and they began to walk back towards to the Shield helicarrier. They were followed by most of the others, who were either injured or looked like they needed a shot of vodka or two.

Thor walked up to Stephen, who absolutely _wasn’t_ intimidated by how the god held Stormbreaker in his hands. “How is Loki and the baby?” He asked, making the Captain’s eyes widen.

_“Baby?!”_

For the first time, Stephen glared at Thor, then cleared his throat as he looked at Steve. “Uh...yeah. Loki is pregnant...don’t tell the others,” he said quietly.

Confused, Steve looked between the two men.

“And you’re the-”

“The father? Yes, now go. You look like death, Captain,” Stephen said, making Steve snort.

“You don’t look too well yourself, magician. Congrats, I'll see you the next time the world goes to shit,” he said, giving them a solute.

Thor called, “Language!” as the Captain walked away, then gave the unimpressed Stephen a sheepish smile.

“Whoops?”

 

* * *

 

Later that night, Stephen stumbled back into the sanctum, shocked to find that Loki was sleeping in bed and not ready by the door with another pillow. Stephen dragged his bruised and injured body into the bathroom, where he showered away layers of dirt and green gloop. Perhaps Loki would know what the aliens were, what they wanted from Earth. If they would ever come back. Had some left so they could repopulate? Afterwards, clad in a pair of boxers, Stephen climbed into the bed. Loki stirred at the feel of the mattress dipping, sleepily nestling herself into Stephen’s embrace.

“I’m surprised you actually listened to me and stayed here.”

“Yeah, well you’re lucky I did listen to you in the first place, asshole.”

“Loki, I’m sorry-"

“I don’t care about that. Are you okay?” She asked.

Stephen squirmed as Loki’s slim hands roamed around his body, grimacing when she pressed her palm against a nasty bruise on his torso. His magic detected another form of magic, Loki’s, as it seeped through his skin, deep into his muscles as the pain of the bruise dulled.

“You’re sweet and caring when you want to be, Lokes.”

“Oh shush, I just don’t want you complaining tomorrow,” she said, but her voice was soft. Stephen knew that if he had needed Loki in that battle, then Loki would have been there, dressed in full Asgardian armour and ready to fight. 

“I love you,” Stephen whispered, a hand sliding down to brush against her stomach. She buried her head against Stephen’s chest, but he could feel her smile.

“I love you too, Stephen Strange.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As much as I'd love this fic to be pure Strangefrost fluff and love...there will be angst :)


	4. "Happy birthday, Lokes."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A certain god's birthday :)

“Have you really eaten a whole pack of oreos? I only bought them yesterday,” Stephen breathed, in disbelief when he found the oreos missing.

Loki shrugged from his place on the sofa, binge watching some show on Netflix. He’d been in his male form as much as he could, to get away from the vomiting and breast aches. ”Well I am eating for two now. Our baby likes oreos,” Loki replied lazily, then stretched out his long legs. With a playful smile, Stephen walked over and knelt next to where Loki was laying.

“Did they tell you that, huh?” he asked, making Loki smile and nuzzle their noses together. He might have escaped most of the pregnancy symptoms as a man, but the increased hormones stayed with him. The god had been clingy and loving, much to Stephen’s shock. He had been on a few missions with the Avengers, and came home to Loki not leaving his side, even when he showered his achy body.

“Mhm, they did,” he teased, then brushed their lips together softly. Just as he was about to climb onto the god’s body, the noise of the front door being opened pulled him from his wicked thoughts.

“Sorcerer!” Thor called, making Loki groan as he shoved Stephen off his body. He sat, giving his brother the usual, sweet ‘I don’t want you here’ smile. He  _always_ seemed to arrive at the Sanctum whenever Stephen and Loki were having a moment. It was like he had some sort of sensor. 

“What do you want?” Loki asked, sprawling his legs over his lover’s legs as Stephen sat down. Thor came into the room, his usual positive self. By the norns, even his aura reeked of happiness and almost gave Loki a headache. Things were well at Asgard, which meant that Loki spent more and more time in the New York Sanctum with Stephen. 

“To merely check on my pregnant brother,” Thor replied, making Loki roll his emerald eyes. The Asgardian King cleared his throat. “And to ask a favour of Stephen,” he added. Dressed in baggy pants and a hoodie, Loki presumed his brother had come from the Avengers’ facility.. A horrible style of clothes, but Loki said nothing.

At that, Stephen’s interest was awoken as he looked up at Thor. “What kind of favour?”

“Uh...a super secret favour in which we must discuss without Loki here,” Thor replied, grinning at the sorcerer supreme.

Loki instantly shot up, looking between the two men in horror. “Excuse me? What’s so important that I mustn't hear?” Loki cried out in protest, but Stephen had already teleported himself and Thor upstairs, leaving Loki on the sofa. Albeit, with a full packet of oreos to keep him happy. Loki had been left out of a lot of missions and Avengers meetings, which he wasn't happy about. Being so early into a pregnancy, Stephen didn't want anything to happen to his boyfriend. 

“What is so important that Loki cannot hear?” He asked, finding that Levi had found its place on Stephen’s shoulder. He was expecting something serious, perhaps about an other-worldly alien coming to kill them all, or the green things which had attacked New York.

Instead, all he got was, “Loki’s birthday party.” Stephen scoffed.

“You want to throw Loki a birthday party? Seriously? He’s the most antisocial person I’ve ever met,” He replied, crossing his arms as he leaned against the wall. Plus, he didn’t quite get on well with the majority of people in the Avengers group chat.

Thor shrugged, gazing at the artefacts around the room as he had done upon his first visit. Though, this time he didn't touch them. “Well...Loki has never really had birthday parties as such, and you _know_ he loves attention...I just thought that we could have a gathering for him,” he explained. That was true, Loki did adore any ounce of attention that Stephen gave him.

“Where are you thinking it could be?” Stephen asked. Thor winced, gazing over at the sorcerer.

“That’s where you come in…” Thor winced.

“Have you never planned a birthday party before?”

“Uh...no.”

Stephen sighed. This was going to be interesting.

 

* * *

 

 

On the morning of Loki’s birthday, he had made his girlfriend a tray filled with her favourite breakfast foods: french toast, different types of fruits, oats and yogurt and other little things he knew she’d enjoy. He set the tray on the nightstand, then climbed onto the bed. Stephen never saw himself as the ‘cute’ boyfriend who made romantic gestures, but he presumed that Loki’s previous birthdays hadn’t been pleasant and he wanted to make her day good. He pulled the sheets back, exposing Loki’s body. She was naked, as per usual, so he reached down and kissed her stomach. Where their little life was growing. The thought of their little oreo, as Loki had childishly decided to call them for now, made Stephen happier than he thought he would have been. 

Though, immediately after doing so, he received a kick as the female immediately shot up. She was wide awake, her ebony in messy curls around her face. When Loki realised what she had done, she sighed, collapsing back against the sheets. “That’s the third time this week,” she groaned, her voice laced with sleep. Stephen merely gave her a soft smile, recovering from the blow as he laid down next to her. “We’ve been together for months, Stephen.” Sometimes, when Stephen woke her from sleep or a short nap she would suddenly wake up, hitting or kicking him out of habit. Even after all this time, Stephen didn't know the horrors that Loki had faced which lead to this. He never pressured her, knowing that Loki would tell him whenever she wanted to.

“It’ll take time, Loki. I’m sorry for waking you like that,” he murmured, brushing hair from her eyes. She took his hand, raising it to her mouth as she kissed it softly. Loki constantly kissed his hands, his surgical scars. When they hurt more than usual, she would use her magic to ease the pain.

“It’s fine. You meant well, my love,” she whispered. He pulled his hand away, only so he could kiss her lips; morning breath and all.

“Happy birthday, Lokes.”

She snorted sleepily. “Did Thor tell you it was my birthday?” she asked, gazing down at him. Carefully, Stephen reached down and laid his head against her stomach. Somehow, he wished he could connect with their baby using his magic. Maybe they would develop magic in Loki and somehow make it possible.

“Maybe,” Stephen replied innocently. “Did you celebrate birthdays in Asgard?"

“Mmh, yes. For the first handful of years, then birthdays simply don’t mean as much. I’m surprised Thor even remembered my birthday,” Loki replied, sliding her pale hand into Stephen’s hair.

“He cares about you, Loki.”

She scoffed. “I know, and he shouldn’t. After all the times I’ve stabbed and betrayed him..” She suddenly shook her head, looking down at him with a smile. 

“That is rather unimportant. Thank you, Stephen. You know, you can be cute when you want to, too,” she replied, the smile turning into a smirk. She sniffed, suddenly sitting up and knocking Stephen off her as she reached for the tray. He laughed, content to let her eat. 

 

* * *

 

 

That evening, Stephen had brought him to New Asgard, where the party would take place. Loki knew nothing, only to dress fancy, which he did. His curls of hair were slicked back, pinned half up with a leather band. Wearing his signature colours, Stephen thought he looked stunning in a suit. 

"You look handsome," Loki murmured, walking up to his boyfriend. He tightened Stephen's tie, then reached up and kissed him. "Can we not just stay here for the evening? I can think of  _so_ many more things we could do..." His hands snaked up Stephen's waist, but the sorcerer shoved him through a portal before things could go further. Really, Stephen did want to keep Loki to himself for the night, but Thor had been so eager for this party. 

The party was busy and successful, with Loki genuinely shocked. He'd spent some of the night with the spider boy they called Peter Parker, who was completely fascinated with the god's magic. He'd been with Valkyrie too, who had furrowed her brows in suspicion when Loki had turned down alcohol. Nobody but Stephen, Thor...and Steve knew about the baby, which was the way it would remain until Loki had his first scan.

 

“Have you had a good time?” Stephen asked, finding Loki on the balcony a few hours later. Loki had been shocked to find out that Thor had managed to keep a secret from him, and that so many people had showed up. The god nodded, letting himself be tucked into Stephen’s side. More and more, Loki found himself easing Stephen into his heart. He didn’t know if it was the fact they were having a baby, or purely because he was in love...but he knew that he wanted to keep Stephen for a long time. For as long as Stephen's mortal life would let them. He laid his head against his boyfriend's shoulder.

“Yeah. It’s...sweet that Thor wanted to organise a party for me,” he replied, “but I’m rather glad that he gave you control over it.”

“Well, I can’t take all the credit for the party. Tony helped a lot, he seems to be the best at party organising.” Tony couldn’t make the actual party, though, for he was looking after Morgan. He’d taken time away from the Avengers to have a few months of ‘normal life.’ After everything that happened, Tony Stark deserved it.

“Ah, so that’s why there was an ice block in the shape of my horned helmet,” Loki said, amused. Silence crept over them, but it was a comfortable type of silence where Stephen imagined their future. Would they marry? Have more children? Or more importantly for now: Would Loki move in with him? His thoughts were cut off by Loki.

“Stephen?”

“Mh?”

“I don’t think I’ve ever felt this way before,” he admitted, deciding to be truthful and open with his boyfriend. When they had first met, it was magical rivalry that kept them close. They were curious of each others magic, craving the knowledge the other had. Their first kiss...it was lousy and messy, but so curious and so perfect. Loki hadn’t had this kind of love before, the type of love that made him want to stay. Thor had actually been shocked that Loki remained on Earth. Really...Loki didn't think he belonged anywhere else. Even Sakaar.

“Felt what way?” Stephen asked. He knew what the god meant...but wanted him to delve further into his thoughts. They rarely had moments where they talked about how they felt, it was more actions that proved their love. Loki swallowed, feeling more relaxed whenever Stephen squeezed his slim waist.

“Love. It's terrifying and thrilling and makes me feel so...vulnerable," Loki replied. He could never deny that, not anymore. He loved Stephen Strange. He looked up into Stephen’s blue eyes, biting his lip slightly. “I’ve never wanted to remain with someone for so long. Never craved their touch when we were apart,” Stephen’s hand found Loki’s toned stomach, despite him being in the wrong form. "I don't know. It's hard to explain, how you make me feel."

“I’ve had a few loves in my life, Loki Odinson, but if you told me I’d be so committed to an alien prince from space I would have probably laughed and asked if you were on crack." 

“A blue alien prince,” Loki corrected, quirking a brow.

Stephen’s brows furrowed slightly. “You’ve never shown me your true form before,” he murmured, brushing his scarred hands up Loki’s shirt. The god gasped quietly at the touch. His skin was _so_ cold. It was always cold, even in the warmest room. 

“Then let me show you."

The balcony door closed with his magic, curtains closing together to grant them privacy. Stephen furrowed his brows slightly.

"Loki, you don't have to."

"But I want to." To shut Stephen up, Loki kissed him. Hard.

When the sorcerer pulled back, breathless, his eyes widened.

Smooth, pale skin was now ridged blue. Emerald eyes were now completely red, and there were horns on his blue forehead. Stephen had never seen such a being before. "You're...you're beautiful," he murmured, feeling the coldness of Loki's body despite being inches apart now.  

Loki swallowed the lump in his throat, feeling wholly vulnerable and...weak. He had been so ashamed of this form, of being so different to Thor and all the other Asgardians. But now, seeing Stephen still look at him with such love and wonder and...awe. It overwhelmed him. He thought he had been ready to completely expose himself to Stephen, to tell him anything he wanted about his past...but he couldn't. Before Stephen's hand could touch his cheek, Loki quickly snapped back to his human form, murmuring an, "Excuse me," before brushing past him. The balcony doors opened once more.

Loki simply walked back to the party, leaving Stephen alone and confused. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Might as well name this fic 'Loki and his conflicted emotions.' welp.
> 
> Apologies if there's any mistakes, it's late here and I'm tired lmao. Update will come soon! I've been getting too caught up in writing a few years into their future to write their present :') 
> 
> Any comments would be appreciated and welcomed!


	5. "You can't always walk away from things."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry...

Thor watched as Loki walked over to him, looking as dismal as the horned ice block which had begun to melt into the huge bowl it was in. He had wished his brother a happy birthday earlier, had forced him into a hug.

“What is the matter, brother?” Thor inquired. He had seen Stephen follow him out onto the balcony, but it had only been Loki who came out back into the room. Immediately, he had thought the worse.

“Nothing,” Loki replied, briskly walking past Thor as if he didn’t know him. If he could drink right now he would. Stephen’s reaction to his Jotun form wasn’t anything he had experienced before. It had been full of positivism, Stephen had called him beautiful...but it overwhelmed him completely. Loki was used to being the monster, the ugly blue alien who was different from everyone else.

The outsider.

Stephen made him feel like he belonged, and it _terrified_ him.

He only made it to the hall when Thor caught up to him, grabbing his wrist. Loki quickly pulled it back and glared. “Thor, I told you nothing was wrong. Go back to the party,” he breathed, then began to walk away.

“You can’t always walk away from things, Loki. You can’t just...stick with what you know and never be ready for change.” An argument with the Sorcerer Supreme, Thor presumed. Something that had made the Prince’s mood change within a mere heartbeat.

Loki scoffed. “If I wasn’t ready for change, dear brother, then I wouldn’t be here. I wouldn’t still be carrying this baby,” he hissed. When he realised that he had been in this form for over an hour, he quickly shifted into his female form in a whirl of emerald. What used to be an emerald and black suit had turned into a glittery dress in a deep shade of green. It cascaded to the floor, hiding black heels.

“What happened?” Her brother asked, in a tone as soft as the God of Thunder could muster.

“Thor, I’m fine. Everything is fine. Thank you for the party, but I’m going back to my rooms now,” she said, leaving Thor alone in the hall as she had done with Stephen. Facing everyone seemed like too much for her right now. So much isolation growing up had given her anxiety.

 

* * *

 

 

Loki was curled up in bed when she heard a knock and a soft, “Loki.” Annoyed, she rolled over and ignored it, until her maturity got the best of her and she forced herself out of the bed and over to the door. When she answered it, Stephen gave her an apologetic smile, with a bunch of roses in one hand and a burrito in the other. Loki had to bite her lip to stop her smile.

Stephen Strange, the _Sorcerer Supreme_ , had come to _her_ room looking like a sheepish puppy.

It was the cutest thing she had ever seen, but she wouldn’t admit that to anybody.

“I’m sorry if I did anything to -”

Loki sighed, hauling him into the room by his wrists. “You did no wrong. I’m just not used to such a reaction, dear,” she replied, closing over the door with her seidr. Stephen handed her the burrito and roses, and only now had she noticed the flowers were black. Ooh.

“Where did you get these? It’s almost eleven at night,” she asked, immediately making herself comfy on the bed so she could rip the paper around the burrito off and eat it. The roses had been left on her vanity, in a golden vase manifested by herself.

“It’s five o’clock somewhere, my love,” he replied, sitting down next to her. His sling ring was slotted on his left hand, giving her a clue about what he did to get her food and flowers.

“Well,” Loki had said after swallowing what was in her mouth, “I appreciate it.” She always seemed to be hungry, and not being able to eat breakfast every morning without being sick wasn’t helping. Stephen helped a lot, making her toast and other foods her stomach could handle. Though, as she came close to finishing the burrito, she gave the last quarter to Stephen. He ate it as Loki sprawled out onto the sheets, then laid down next to her. Moonlight came through a slot between the closed curtains, illuminating them both.

“Did you have a good birthday?” He murmured, then added, “Other than what happened earlier.” She seemed to have calmed down over it, but wasn’t talking about it at all. That was fine. Stephen would give her time.

“Mhm,” she murmured. Stephen had gotten her a silver ring, which had an emerald embedded in it. She looked at it now, how it shone so nicely in the moonlight. A promise ring, Stephen had said that morning, to show that he loved her. A gesture that seemed to warm her cold heart up. She smiled faintly at it, then glanced down in Stephen’s direction.

“I’m sorry for earlier. For walking off,” she offered. An apology was rather rare from her. Stephen looked up, kissing the side of her full mouth gently.

“Shush, I understand,” he murmured. He didn’t yet know what had happened to Loki in the past, but he knew it was horrible enough for it to still be traumatizing her. Loki hummed quietly, turning her head so their lips met. She turned on the bed and sat, kicking a leg over and straddling Stephen’s waist.

“I’m trying to open myself up to you more, Stephen. To show you that I am committed-”

“Loki, I _know_ you are committed. Isn’t a baby and the fact that you love me enough?” He asked, breaking the kiss to look up at her. Loki made a face as she pulled off his blazer and tie, throwing them to the other side of the room.

“Perhaps,” she murmured.

“It _is_ enough, and if I have to make you say you love me every day to prove that you’re committed then I will do so,” he said, pulling her pyjama top over her head. Loki’s eyes danced, shining like pure emeralds in the darkness.

“Another promise, my dear Doctor?” She whispered, giving him a small smirk.

Stephen gazed up at her with a hazy grin. “If that’s what it takes, then yes. Why don’t we start from now?” He asked, quirking a brow in challenge.

Loki smiled back, but didn’t speak until all of their clothes were off and a heap on the floor. “I love you,” she whispered just as their lips met, and any tension they held faded into pure pleasure.

 

* * *

 

 

“Are you sure you will be okay?” Loki asked, furrowing his ebony brows as he looked up at Stephen. The sorcerer was taller, but only by an inch or two. Of course his lover teased him for it; Loki was meant to be a Frost Giant. Stephen cupped Loki’s face, looking his emerald eyes. They seemed to flicker with protectiveness, the need to keep his boyfriend safe. The ugly green aliens had attacked again, which meant that Stephen had been right- they had left to repopulate. Loki hadn’t seen them, but by the mess of Stephen the first time he really didn’t want to.

“Yes, you forget that I’m the Sorcerer Supreme," Stephen said, receiving a playful eye roll from Loki. "Besides, the Avengers will be there. I’m not alone,” he reminded Loki for the fifth time; it felt like the hundredth, though.

“I wish you would let me come. You know I can remain in this form for a while-”

“Loki, no,” Stephen cut in, his voice getting rougher. The god sighed, but didn’t argue. It wasn’t like him to not argue, but he told himself that he would be back in all the action as soon as the baby was born. He couldn’t deny that Stephen had made him softer. Though, he hadn’t shown his lover his Jotun form since the party two weeks ago. Within those two weeks not a lot happened. Loki mainly lazed around the Sanctum or his room in New Asgard, practising new spells and learning more about Stephen’s magic; which wasn’t all innocent.

“Okay,” Loki eventually said, then reached up and kissed Stephen’s lips. Obviously, the Sorcerer responded, wrapping an arm around Loki’s waist to press him closer.

“If you don’t leave within the next few seconds,” Loki breathed, “then I’m afraid I’m going to have you on that sofa as quick as you can conjure a portal.” Stephen grinned against his lips when he heard a cough come from behind them. Wong.

“When I get back,” he whispered, kissing Loki once more before he reluctantly pulled back. Well, at least Loki didn’t hit him with pillows in protest anymore because he couldn’t go. Stephen slid his sling ring onto his hand, then created a portal. “Goodbye,” he mouthed, then let Wong slip through the portal before he did. The portal disappeared into a few orange sparks.

 

* * *

 

 

Loki had spend the evening alone, sulking over a tub of ice cream and some cringey show on Wong’s Netflix. It was late, with the sun fallen, but Stephen and Wong weren’t back yet. It filled her with worry, tempting her to suit up and join the others...but she had to have more faith in her Doctor. She had begun to doze off around midnight, until she heard the fizz of a portal and groans of pain in the foyer of the Sanctum. She recognised them, making her instantly shot up. She forgot about the TV and ice cream as she bolted where the noises were coming from.

Stephen, being held up by Wong. Blood coated the blue of his clothes...even Levi in some places was a darker shade of red. Loki’s seidr immediately scanned all over Stephen’s body, finding the wound on his torso. A nasty one which had Loki's heart hammering.

She rushed over, demanding, “What the _hell_ happened?” as Stephen fell into her arms with a weak groan. He buried his head against her neck.

“W-we were ambushed-” Stephen breathed out.

“We couldn’t fight all of them off. Some of the others got injured pretty badly, but Stephen is the worst,” Wong interrupted, then ran off to get medical equipment. He hadn’t given her enough detail, so she used her seidr to scan the wound in more depth. It still oozed blood and was deep, but she hadn’t been able to see any internal damage. Good. The weapon had been a dagger with ridges on the blade, she presumed by the roughness of the injury.

Before he could bleed out she shuffled them both onto the floor, resulting in a pain-filled moan from the Sorcerer. Loki had rarely felt panic and true terror for someone’s life being at risk, but now it overwhelmed her to the point where she couldn’t breathe. She shifted into her male form, then used the strength to rip Stephen’s tunic away from the wound. Loki winced at the sight of it, desperately looking up for Wong. “Hurry up!” He yelled in panic.

The sorcerer returned with a cloth and a bowl of saline water, and together they had worked on cleaning the wound. Stephen groaned through gritted teeth, gripping onto Loki’s free hand until his scarred hand was white.

“I’m here,” Loki whispered, hiding the panic in his voice. Finally, when the wound looked much cleaner as if did earlier, Loki began to use his seidr on it. With his magic, it was as if Stephen’s skin had gone see-through, revealing the veins and muscle and bone within. Carefully, Loki began to stitch it up with his magic, biting his lip in concentration. Afterwards, when only a nasty, sensitive scar remained, Loki sat back and sighed. Stephen had either fallen asleep or was unconscious, but he was alive.

That’s all that mattered to Loki.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a habit of writing this late at night, so I apologise if there are typos! I know this angst was short-lived, but believe me, this isn't the end of it.
> 
> On a side note, 'I Love You' by Billie Eilish is a very Strangefrost song to me.
> 
> As always, thank you for reading- comments would be appreciated! :)


	6. Home wasn't a building, but a person.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wanda and Loki would have a good friendship. Fight me.

Stephen awoke in his own bedroom, groaning as the sunlight filled his eyes for the first time in...how long was he out for? He ran a hand down his face, then slowly sat up when he heard murmured voices. Dizziness swirled like a tornado in his head, and he fought the urge to throw up as he looked between the two men. Huh?

“Welcome back from the dead, buddy,” Bruce said, walking closer to the bed.

“I’m sorry...why are you two here?” Stephen said, utterly confused. They usually only visited when they needed something from the Sorcerer Supreme.

“Hello to you too, magician,” Tony said smoothly, playfully rolling his eyes. “We’re here because you decided to get a nasty infection if that wound of yours. Scared the shit out of Loki-”

At the mention of his lover, Stephen looked around the bedroom in search for him. Where was he? Was their baby okay?

“He’s sleeping. Hadn’t left your side in days,” Bruce said, crossing his arms. Stephen groaned quietly as he began to stand, but was immediately shoved down by Tony. “Easy there, doctor. You’ve been passed out for three days,” Tony said, only adding to Stephen’s confusion.

“Three days?!” Stephen exclaimed. Immediate worry for the world flashed over his mind, if there was a sudden attack on Earth-

Bruce must’ve read the expression on Stephen’s face, for he said, “The only thing that’s happened is Loki threatening to beat our asses if something happened to you, so thank god you’re okay,” he said, smiling through a wince. Suddenly he missed Loki terribly, but also feared the moment he was reunited with his love. He could already imagine the lecture he would get. Stephen fell back against the bed again, cursing himself for not just leaving the room and continuing his job. Hopefully Wong had been able to take his place for the days he’d been unconscious. Right now...he just wasn’t bothered to move.

After a few checks from a nurse, Helen Cho, Stephen was allowed to be left alone as he dozed off again, only waking when he felt a hand slip into his, squeezing softly. His eyes opened to meet watery emerald ones.

“Stephen,” Loki breathed, his voice weak, as if he had been crying. “I-I thought you were fine until it got infected...I don’t know how-”

“Shush, come here,” Stephen said, hauling Loki onto the bed with him.

The god laid his head on Stephen’s chest, “You scared me,” Loki breathed as he gazed up at Stephen.

“I’m sorry,” he murmured, reaching out touch Loki’s pale cheek gently. The god tilted his head into Stephen’s touch, sighing quietly. If had lost Stephen...he didn’t know what he would have done. How he would have raised their child by himself. Almost losing the sorcerer proved to himself how in love he actually was, and it terrified him. Loki shook his head, then reached up and kissed his lips softly.

“You know what this proves?”

“Hm?”

“That I should come with you on missions.”

“Loki, no.” Stephen furrowed his brows.

“Loki, _yes_.”

Stephen wisely stayed silent, instead wrapping his arm tighter around Loki. That was an argument for another day, when a mission came up.

 

* * *

 

_Ten Weeks Later_

 

“Hit the target with more confidence. You can do so much more harm than you’re doing right now,” Loki said, intently watching as red balls of magic were thrown at a target again and again. It burst into flames, which was quickly doused by a sprinkler that was controlled by Tony Stark’s computer system. Even after weeks, Tony's tech still mesmerised Loki completely.

“I _am_ hitting it with confidence,” Wanda Maximoff said, a bead of sweat running down her forehead. Loki wasn’t allowed to train hard anymore, but that didn’t mean she would give up being the Scarlet Witch’s instructor.

“No, you’re worried about causing harm so you’re going softer than you are capable of doing,” Loki explained, which was the truth. She had been told of the incident before the Civil War between the Avengers, of the people Wanda had accidentally killed. Of the guilt she had felt. Loki knew that Wanda had the potential of being one of the most powerful beings in the world, but she was holding back. Loki gave her a nod, indicating to the target. “Try again.”

Wanda slowly nodded, sucking in a breath before she manifested another crimson ball between her hands, yelling out when she hurled it at the target. This time, the target was obliterated completely.

Loki grinned widely.

“Well done, baby witch,” Loki breathed, walking over to the younger female. “I knew you had it in you.”

Wanda smiled faintly at the praise, thankful she had a teacher to help control...whatever it was inside of her. The Sorcerer Supreme sometimes taught her, but his job got in the way, so Loki had eagerly offered to help. Anything to gain the Avengers’ trust. Loki crossed her arms. She was wearing one of Thor’s dark hoodies, to hide the baby bump now forming. Nobody but her lover, brother and Wong knew...and the Captain Rogers, thanks to Thor. Though, Stephen had suggested they tell the others tonight. Tonight was the ‘get together’ night, where they all met up at the Avengers building and ordered a takeaway. It happened once a month, now that the attacks on Earth had been less frequent. They were still trying to figure out if there was some sort of schedule for the attacks...but more and more lives were being lost to each attack. The council was getting angry, so they had to do something fast.

“Will you be there tonight?” Wanda asked, her accent thick.

Loki nodded, grabbing her water bottle and taking a sip. “Think so. Stephen will probably force me anyways, but I won’t argue when there’s free food,” she replied, shrugging. Recently, she had found herself drawn to the witch, forming a stronger bond with each of their daily lessons. She was probably her favourite Avenger to spend time with. Wanda didn’t need help with her magic in general, but she needed help with her control and confidence. She had so much potential, which Loki was determined to draw out of her.

“Will you tell them about the baby, then?”

Loki stilled, looking up at Wanda with wide eyes. The witch snorted. “You don’t think I know why you suddenly rush off in our early morning sessions? I know the symptoms from Pepper Potts,” Wanda replied smoothly, grinning at Loki’s still-shocked face. “And all you wear are baggy clothes. How many weeks are you?” She asked.

Loki recovered, merely giving the witch a smile. “Around fourteen weeks,” she said, then glanced up towards the door and grinned. “Thought you had super special top secret mission?” Loki asked as Stephen approached them, clad in a vest top and baggy bottoms, a belt of soft fabric around his waist. Wanda pretended to gag as they kissed.

“I did, actually. Didn’t take too long. Hey, Wanda. How’s the training going?” He said, offering her a small smile.

Wanda returned it and shrugged. “Fine, I think I’m getting better.”

Stephen nodded. “Show me.” And so she did for most of the afternoon, training with the two love-birds until the mid afternoon, when they were all exhausted and in need of a shower before tonight.

 

* * *

 

 

Loki and Stephen arrived at the Avengers Compound later that evening, being greeted by the whole of the team. Loki guessed they were still sceptical of her, but she did what she could to rightfully earn their trust. “Drink?” Natasha asked, tilting her head as she gazed at Loki from the other side of the bar as she walked up. The goddess bit her lip for a moment. She was pretty thankful for the casual clothing code, as she wore one of Thor’s hoodies again to hide the bump. “Do you have anything non-alcoholic?” Nat raised an auburn brow, but still conjured up some ‘mock-tail,’ as she called it. Loki took a sip, subtly testing for any poisons before she decided that it was clean. “Unusual,” Loki murmured, making the Black Widow snort, grabbing her own cocktail before she slipped away to the group congregating on the sofas. Chinese food covered the coffee table in the centre of the room, making Loki realise that she hadn’t eaten all day.

She squished herself between Stephen and Thor, who were already picking at different foods. As she ate, she listened to the conversation between them all, but looked across the room when she felt eyes on her. Hazel eyes met hers, as Morgan Stark smiled over at her, clapping her hands as she was bounced on her father's lap. Loki smiled at the baby, pulling faces until Morgan giggled. Huh. Perhaps she'd be a better mum than she thought. 

"-and with Loki being pregnant..."

She suddenly snapped her gaze away from the baby to glare at Thor, but all the others were staring at her. Wanda smiled smugly into her plate of rice, and Steve merely continued to eat. Stephen choked on his drink.

Thor winced, sheepishly smiling at Loki. "Uh..."

"So  _that's_ why she wasn't drinking!" Natasha chimed, "I knew it."

"We all knew it," Tony said in deadpan, making Loki furrow her brows. How? 

"How? We didn't tell anyone," Stephen replied calmly. He was kinda thankful that he didn't need to tell them himself.

Bruce scratched the back of his neck. "Ah, well...you kinda told us when you were ill with the infection..."

This time, it was Stephen's time to receive a glare from Loki. The sorcerer certainly  _didn't_ remember that at all. 

"I believe a congratulations are in order. Good luck on getting zero sleep," Tony teased. The reason for his lack of sleep giggled, happily bouncing on his lap. 

 

* * *

 

 

The majority of the night consisted of congratulations and more chat, including another challenge to see who could fit the most rice in their mouths.

Surprisingly, it was Sam Wilson. It felt strange for Loki to see them all on hoodies and casual wear, to see them act like mere humans and not the superheroes they were. She guessed it was nice to see their vulnerable side like this, and to see the way in which they smiled or laughed around those they trusted. 

As the night progressed, some of them were still drinking and chatting, whilst others looked as if they were ready to fall asleep on the spot. Morgan was cuddled into Natasha Romanoff's chest, sound asleep. Loki had shifted into a male, still wearing the clothes he had stolen from both Stephen and Thor. At the beginning of the night he felt shy to share affection with his boyfriend, but now his head was against his shoulder, half asleep. Loki had began to feel more and more comfortable with the Avengers. Yes they didn't wholly trust him, but they didn't treat him like a monster, like the villain he used to be.

Thor was the first to announce he had to leave, to take care of a new things in New Asgard. Loki stood, letting Thor hug him, making him lose the ability to breathe for the moments he was embraced. “Okay, okay. You’ve given enough affection to make my head ache. Shoo,” Loki breathed, batting his hands. Thor laughed quietly, a sound which Loki was thankful to hear. Thor deserved all the happiness in the world after everything, and the selfish part of Loki told him that he did too. “Fine. Goodbye brother," Thor said, inclining his head towards the others as he left. Wanda took his spot, wearing an oversized sweater and a pair of leggings. She had a glass of wine in her hands.

“I know how it feels,” Wanda murmured, smiling sadly.

“Know how what feels?”

“To have an older brother.” Loki stilled for a moment, his brows furrowing ever so slightly. He hadn’t remembered ever seeing her with a brother.

Before he could question, or even think about it sooner, Wanda continued. “He died a few years ago, sacrificing himself so Clint and an innocent child could live.” Clint Barton was on the other side of the room, laughing with Bucky and Sam. A moment of silence grew as she watched them, then added, “I miss him.”

“I’m sorry, Wanda. He’s still here...just not in the way you want him to be.” That was the same for his mother, Frigga. How he wished that she were still here, to give him blunt truths and to hold him when he needed it. He wasn’t sure what else to say, how he could ever ease the hole that had been in the witch’s heart for years. Heartache was a strange thing, affecting people in so many ways. What would he do if he ever lost his older brother? Thor was the only family that he had, had been the only person who stuck with him through the insanity.

He guessed Stephen was now his family, and their baby. Perhaps he would eventually see the Avengers as family. 

She gave him a little nod, sighing quietly as she leaned against the sofa. “I know. I guess he would be happy to know that I’m not alone, that I have a home,” she murmured.

“You’ll always have the Avengers, Wanda. Including Natasha,” he said with a wink.

For that he got elbowed.

 

* * *

 

 

When it grew past midnight, the room began to slowly empty, and Loki practically hauled Stephen off the sofa. They bid their farewells before Stephen summoned up a portal of orange sparks and the pair slid through it, back into the empty Sanctum. Wong was currently at the London one. 

"Well...at least they know now," Loki breathed, immediately crawling under the duvet as Stephen undressed. He wouldn't have to hide the bump anymore when he was female. 

"Mhm. I still don't remember telling them," Stephen confessed, climbing in alongside Loki when he was merely in his boxers. A good sight for Loki to see.

Loki shifted closer as soon as he could, tangling their legs. "That doesn't matter anymore," Loki murmured, cupping Stephen's chin with a pale hand. Using his thumb, he stroked over the sorcerer's lower lip. 

"No. It doesn't," Stephen replied, reaching forward to kiss the god.

After sleepy kisses and a few murmurs of those three special words, Loki had shifted back into her female form and they had peacefully fallen asleep cuddled into each other. Loki's body was cold, perfect for Stephen to hold when it was too warm.

Loki's home wasn't a building, he had realised earlier, but a person. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, that end part defintely wasn't really needed...but Stephen and Loki fluff scenes are my complete weakness.


	7. "You're not a monster."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The beginning of how they came to be, and the end of Loki's grip on keeping the past a secret.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings; mention of attempted suicide in the past.

~ _Several Months Before_ ~

 

“You want to what?” Stephen crossed his arms, staring at Thor Odinson...who looked entirely different from how the sorcerer last saw him. Darker, shorter hair...and lacking an eyeball, it seemed. Right.

“I want to build a New Asgard in Norway, with your permission,” he replied, to which Stephen quirked a brow.

“And why would you need my permissio- oh,” he said, as if the light bulb in his brain finally flickered on. “Loki.”

Thor winced slightly at the mention of his younger brother. Why was Loki, the God of Mischief, on Earth anyways? Stephen found it hard to believe that the brothers were working together.

“Yes. He saved our people during Ragnarok, unleashed Sutar so that Hela, our sister, would be killed. He is currently healing people on the ship as we speak. He-”

“Woah woah woah, okay. Uh…” That was a lot to process at eight in the morning. Stephen touched his forehead for a few moments, contemplating. “What about _my_ people, Thor? Those he killed in New York? Loki is a psychopathic-”

“He isn’t psychopath,” Thor cut in. “He just…” The god sighed. “That was years ago. Can’t people change?”

Yes, they could. Stephen himself had changed. For the better, he thought. “Yes, but not Loki,” he replied, but cursed himself for even considering it. A happy Thor was when his brother was near, and he sure as hell didn’t want anymore trouble here on Earth.

“How do I prove it, then?” Thor looked at him as he leaned against the staircase of the Sanctum Sanctorum. He had to admit that seeing Thor defend his brother was impressive after all the shit Loki had put Thor through. He still saw goodness in his brother when nobody else did.

Stephen thought for a moment. “Five hours a day Loki Odinson will remain here in this building as a uh...an assistant. Within those hours he can prove just how much he changed.” He highly doubted that the god had suddenly turned into a hero, but he would give him the chance to prove himself so he could remain on Earth.

“Deal,” Thor immediately said, holding a hand out. Stephen reached out his gloved hand and shook Thor’s, then crossed his arms over his chest once again.

“Deal.”

 

* * *

 

 

Days later, Stephen heard faint arguing as he walked down the stairs, clad in baggy bottoms and a t-shirt, with a grey cardigan over the top. When he recognised the voices he walked into the foyer, groaning internally.

“This is a bad idea, brother. I’m not being an assistant to some mortal magician who-”

“This is the only way you’ll be able to stay on Earth, Loki,” sounded Thor’s calm voice. He seemed like a friendly golden Labrador to Loki’s hissing black cat.

“Then I will leave.”

“Loki, _no_.”

Stephen cleared his throat, gaining the attention of both brother’s before they could have a scrap in the Sanctum. Thor’s blue eyes were soft in greeting, but Loki’s emerald ones were narrowed.

“Loki.”

“Second rate.”

Thankfully, the god didn’t manifest daggers this time, but he was wearing the same black suit. Same greasy hair. Same godly handsomeness that Stephen decided to ignore entirely. “Thank you for this, Stephen,” Thor said softly, as Loki continued to glare at him. This was going to be a long day.

Afterwards, when Thor returned to Norway to handle 'kingly duties,' Stephen merely walked over to the counter and made himself a coffee. He’d need a lot if he had to spend five hours with Loki Odinson every day.

“Do Asguardians have coffee?”

Loki snorted. “Of course, we aren’t barbarians,” he snapped, but quietly added, “I prefer tea, though.”

Stephen took that as a request and made tea, handing it to Loki. To his shock, he was thanked. Polite god.

“So...what am I to do?” He inquired, taking a sip of the tea. Stephen was shocked again when Loki didn't complain about it.

“Nothing for now, until I trust you.”

Loki scowled. “So you want me to die of boredom?” Dramatic ass.

“No, you drama queen. As long as you don’t steal or touch anything else, you may have access to the library,” Stephen replied coolly.

“Who says I want to read your mortal novels?” Loki snapped back. Oh, this would be a long day for sure. Stephen had finally found someone as sassy as him who wasn’t Tony Stark.

“Then die of boredom,” was all Stephen said before he walked off, leaving Loki in the kitchen with his tea.

 

Hours later, Stephen found Loki in the library. He was curled up on a chair with a book, looking surprisingly peaceful. Like earlier, Stephen cleared his throat, and the softness on Loki’s face disappeared immediately as he looked up.

“Enjoying yourself?”

Loki scoffed. “I wouldn’t go as far as to saying that, second rate,” he replied, standing up.

“Thor will be here for you soon,” Stephen said as they both walked out of the library. They stayed silent, perhaps trying to avoid a fight.

As expected, Thor was waiting for them in the foyer. Thankfully he hadn’t broken anything. “Ready?” He asked, looking at his bored brother. Loki nodded, conjuring up a portal. Unlike Stephen’s orange sparks, this one was dark green.

“Thank you, wizard. See you tomorrow,” Thor chirped, and Stephen nodded his head before both brothers left through the emerald portal.

And that was only day one.

 

* * *

 

_~Present Day~_

 

 Stephen woke to the smell of pancakes throughout the Sanctum Sanctorum, wondering who the hell was making food at...he groaned as he opened his eyes, looking at the digital clock. Three am. Right.

He realised who it was as soon as he reached out and found Loki gone.

Reluctantly, Stephen dragged his ass out of bed, stumbling downstairs to the kitchen. He found Loki at the stove, trying to flip pancakes. Already, a neat stack was sitting on the counter.

“Hungry?” He asked sleepily. He gave Loki a kiss on the cheek as she hummed in response.

“Yup,” she chirped, seemingly far more awake than Stephen Strange. He rubbed his eyes, then leaned against the counter. Loki reached up on her tiptoes and hunted the shelves.

"Looking for something?" He asked, tilting his head to the side. 

"Yeah, the...aha!" She said, too full of enthusiasm at this time of the morning. She lifted down a jar of Nutella, then grabbed a knife. Pancakes and Nutella seemed to be a craving of hers right now, so Stephen had taught her how to use the stove for when he wasn't around.

"You know, you could have woken me," Stephen said, quirking a brow as she slathered the spread over each pancake. 

Loki shrugged. "You looked so peaceful as you slept, I didn't want to wake you." 

He turned off the stove and washed the dishes as Loki continued to put Nutella on the pancakes, then the two of them hiked back up the stairs with the plate.

 

* * *

 

 

When they had finished the pancakes and Stephen had wiped Nutella from the corner of Loki's mouth they found themselves in silence, with Loki gazing over at the wall.

“What’s up?” He asked, brushing hair from her eyes. It was always so soft and silky, even when Loki was a male. Stephen tilted his head, noticing how the moonlight illuminated her pale skin. She looked like she belonged up with the stars.

“Nothing, I just…” She shook her head, stopping herself from continuing. The mood changed. This often happened. Loki would be ready to open up, only to suddenly stop herself, as if Stephen wasn’t ready to hear what she had to say. Sometimes he got snippets of Loki’s past, but never in any detail. Perhaps Loki herself wasn’t ready to hear herself speak it out loud.

“I will listen,” Stephen murmured, placing a hand on her shoulder. She was wearing one of his shirts, covering up the bump. He sat behind her, letting her stare at the painted wall in thought. When Stephen had placed a kiss on the shoulder that the shirt had fallen off, Loki began to speak.

“I’ve never been in an environment where I wasn’t constantly judged and compared to my brother,” she said quietly. Stephen stayed silent, thankful that she was opening up. Loki trusted him. “If I ever did something wrong, I was always told that Thor would have never done it. After New York…” She sighed. “By the Norns, I’ve never felt like so much of an outsider. I was just a villain, someone who my dad deemed worthy of remaining in prison for the rest of my life.”

“Why did you..” Stephen thought for a moment on how to word his question, enough time for Loki to turn around and look at him over her shoulder. “Why did you try and take over New York in the first place?”

Loki looked away again, furrowing her dark brows. She didn’t answer for a long time, making Stephen think that she wouldn’t answer at all. But she did.

“I was always in Thor’s shadow when growing up. Always. He was this blessed, blonde god who was loved and admired by all. I was the weird brother who would never be King. Forever the shadow. At least now I know why,” she said bitterly. Had Loki told anyone this before? “When I…” Loki swallowed the lump in her throat, “When I fell from the Bifrost...I intended to kill myself. I didn’t...I didn’t think that Thanos would resurrect me.” His eyes widened. Loki had died. She looked up at Stephen and smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes. A broken smile. “Did you think I wanted to become the slave of the biggest psychopath in the universe, Stephen? Of course I didn’t try and plead my case for innocence. I knew they wouldn’t believe me, and I also knew you wouldn’t have believed me back then.”

He stayed silent, knowing he _wouldn’t_ have believed it. But now he did. The doctor didn’t know what to say. How to even react to such...sad events. Loki had suffered more than he thought. The whole of New York saw Loki as a monster, but in reality she had been brainwashed. As much a victim as Barton, or as Erik Selvig.

“Loki…” He touched her shoulder softly.

“ _Don’t_ ,” She breathed. “Do _not_ give me pity. What happened _happened_ and I cannot change any of it. Telling them won’t change anything-”

“It would change everything, Loki. If they knew the truth-”

She scoffed and interrupted him. “If they knew the truth, then they would see me as some tortured weakling who isn’t _near_ half a god as her brother. Do you really think that’s how I want to be seen?” She turned and looked at Stephen. He noticed a tear roll down her cheek, glistening in the mood light. Heightened emotions due to pregnancy hormones or was she breaking? If she had bottled up all this for so many years, Stephen guessed that it was both.

“Well? Do you?” She snapped, looking at Stephen.

He slowly shook his head, not wanting to fight with her. She was sleepy and sad and probably just needed to be held.

So he did. Gently, Stephen tugged Loki into his arms. She said nothing, but didn't pull away. Silence passed as he put the empty plate to the side, wrapping the duvet around them as they laid down.

"No, I don't," he finally said, as one of his hands rested on her bump. "I think you want them to trust you more than anything. You'd rather them see you as the redeemed villain for who you truly are. Perhaps it's ego, or perhaps you just don't want to be pitied." Perhaps it was both. "You're not a monster, nor a villain, Loki. You never were," he said quietly. Her eyes fluttered as she looked at him.

"If I am not those things, then what am I?" She asked quietly. 

"You tell me."

Loki took a moment to think. "A god. A...Frost Giant. The princess of Asgard. A sorcerer. And soon...a mother."

Stephen smiled faintly, cupping her cheeks with both hands. She actually let him smoosh them together.

"You're missing something."

She looked up at him in hazy confusion.

"What?"

"You're also mine."

She grinned sleepily, reaching up to kiss him before she tucked her head against his chest.

"That I am," was all she murmured before she fell asleep.

 


	8. "What do you know about trust?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dedicated to the lovely @laily because they inspired the baby clothes shopping and I adore the idea that Loki loves spicy food <3
> 
> For female Loki, I've recently been picturing Carli Bybel. She's stunning!

_~Past~_

Two weeks later, Stephen decided that perhaps Loki wasn’t as bad as he seemed. He hadn’t wrecked the sanctum. Hadn’t tried to kill him or steal the Eye of Agamotto. Hadn’t done...much apart from drink tea and read books in the library. It unsettled Stephen, if he were honest. Was this all some trick to gain Stephen’s trust and then betray him last minute? He was the God of Mischief and Lies after all.

Currently, said God was huddled up on the large inside windowsill of Stephen’s office, reading a book. Piles of other books were on the floor, ones of which he had already read. He was making a bloody mess, but Stephen said nothing. At least it wasn't a mess of New York or his own guts. Stephen glanced over at him from his desk, then looked back down at his own work. Why Loki was in his office he didn’t even know. Perhaps it was the view of New York, or maybe because the windowsill had comfy pillows and the room was always a perfect temperature thanks to Stephen's magic...and a fan. 

“What are you reading?” Stephen dared to ask. They rarely spoke, but being in a room alone together was no longer awkward. Perhaps a little weird, but never awkward. Loki didn’t look up.

“Some book on Norse mythology,” he replied, making Stephen furrow his brows slightly. “Surely you know everything?” Finding out that the Norse myths weren’t _actually_ myths were quite a shock when he first found out...but then again everything Stephen was surrounded with in the Sanctum used to be myths to him. Until he opened his eyes.

“I do, but your mortal authors don’t know everything. It’s rather amusing to read what they write about us.” Stephen set his pen down.

“Like what?”

Finally, Loki looked over at him with a small grin. “Well...according to this book I have a foal for a child...along with other animals,” Loki mused. “Jormungandr, Sleipnir and Fenrir...as well as two children with some female I’ve never heard of,” he read from the book, skimming through a chapter called ‘The Children of Loki.’ Stephen listened, tilting his head to the side in thought.

“You don’t have children?” Loki shook his head. “Not at all. I’ve never been interested in lovers, never mind children,” he replied. He had been so focused on himself, on being his brother's equal. Well, he'd had one lover, but it hadn't ended well for either of them.

Stephen didn’t think he had heard Loki speak so much, but then again it was about himself. “And what about the Norse Loki’s magic? Do you have that?” Stephen asked. He guessed it was interesting to find out more about the gods, especially when two would be living on earth for a while at least. A roundabout way of finding out just how powerful Loki was. If he was a big a threat as Stephen believed.

Loki looked at him for a moment, before he turned his head and gazed out of the window before him. The sound of traffic and voices below were loud, but even as a surgeon Stephen was used to that.

“The shapeshifting? Yes. I can shift myself into anybody or anything I like,” he replied, rather proud of that ability. It had aided him when it came to tricks against his older brother. Especially when shifting into a snake. He set his book down and stood, walking over to the bookshelf. Silence passed between them as Loki searched for a book. With how fast he read, Stephen presumed that the whole Asgardian library had been read by Loki growing up.

“Did you know the ancient one, Loki?” Stephen asked, watching as the god looked through the books on the dusty shelf, brushing pale fingertips over the spines. They stilled slightly for a moment.

Loki hummed quietly. “Briefly. I visited her a few times. Her skills were impressive considering that she was a being of Earth."

Ignoring that dig Stephen continued, "Did you know that she was harnessing power from the Dark Dimension to stay alive?” Loki stilled again, turning around to look at the Sorcerer Supreme.

“She was a human. Did you truly not wonder how she lived for so long?” Loki asked. So the answer was yes, then. Stephen didn't know exactly why he asked him, but it was interesting to know that Loki knew his past teacher.

“How many times have you been on Earth?” Stephen asked again, taking advantage of the fact Loki was actually talking to him.

“I apologise. I would have slept longer if I knew I was going to be interrogated,” Loki murmured in deadpan. Conversation over. Right.

“Fine. I’ll leave you be,” Stephen said. Just as he was about to stand and leave his office Loki said, “Wait,” with a sigh. Perhaps Stephen wasn’t the only one who felt lonely in this Sanctum.

“Too many times to count. As I grew up, I explored the Nine Realms a lot. Midgard intrigued me with its technology and culture. I first came here when I was considered a teenager, when I was commissioned my first ship for my birthday. I had found out that there were sorcerers on Earth and decided to look for them. I found myself in Kamar Taj, where the Ancient One was.” Stephen was taken aback that he was receiving so much information. Truly, he hadn’t ever heard Loki say so much before. Why was Loki giving him such knowledge? “Their power bewildered me, how they could just...change reality.” Did Loki know of the mirror dimension? Best not ask, Stephen decided. “At the time I was being taught magic by my mother…” Loki stopped for a few moments, as if to gather his thoughts, remembering his mother. “She was a witch, and was raised by witches too. Frigga knew the Ancient One, so she allowed me lessons with her too. She taught me control, and how to create pockets where I could hide things. Like the tesseract,” He said with a little grin. “When my lessons were over, mother gave her a gift.”

“What was it?” Stephen asked, making Loki smile faintly in remembrance.

“Have you seen a red teapot in Kamar Taj? It has golden swirls around it, I think. I only remember that because I had taken a tantrum. Thor’s colours...but it’s beautiful regardless,” Loki said in amusement.

Stephen had, actually. “You must’ve been a good student, then.” The Ancient One only chose those who she knew had goodness and potential in them. What made Loki change so much? Why had the Ancient One not try to change his future?

Loki shrugged. “I was eager to learn something that my brother could not. I thought my magic would impress my father and make me stand out.” Until he was crowned God of Mischief. After that, his magic was used for tricks and gimmicks. Then, nobody took him seriously. Especially not Odin. Loki pulled out a book, flicking through some of the pages before he sighed and set it back. He returned to the windowsill, perching on it as Stephen continued to work. Loki looked over at him, how a strand of brown hair rested on the sorcerer's forehead. Devastatingly handsome was Stephen Strange, but Loki wouldn't bring himself to say that aloud. Why he had told him so much of his past with magic? He didn't know, but it felt good to tell someone.

“My turn. How did you come about to be the sorcerer supreme anyways?” Loki asked, breaking moments of silence. Memories flashed in Stephen's mind. The car crash. Feeling...nothing in his fingers.

_You ruined me._

_Poor Stephen Strange, the charity case._

_Forget everything you think you know._

_We don't get to choose our time._

_Dormamu, I've come to bargain._

He didn't realise he had been expressive in his memories until Loki peered over at him with those dark, dark brows furrowed. "Uh...that story is pretty boring," he murmured, but it was pretty much the opposite.

Loki crossed his arms over his chest. "And me learning spells to turn my brother into a frog was rather boring but you listened to me anyways," he challenged. Stephen sucked in a breath, then looked down at his hands. Still shaky, with scars running up each finger like vines. If Loki had noticed them, he said nothing.

“I became the Sorcerer Supreme because The Ancient One died-”

“No, I mean how you gained such power. You’re a mortal, surely you weren’t born into the mystic arts?” Loki commented as he stood, stretching out his long limbs. For a Frost Giant he wasn’t very...giant. Stephen was taller than him.

“No, I was not.”

“So how did you find out about Kamar Taj? The Ancient One?”

“That’s none of your business.”

Loki looked at Stephen as if he had been slapped. “And you think my past with magic was yours?” He snapped, “You know, trust is a two way thing-”

Stephen scoffed. “As if _you_ know _anything_ about trust, Loki. You’re the God of Lies,” Stephen spat, making the God’s eyes flicker in anger. Stephen swore he saw a mist of emerald at Loki’s fingertips, but it disappeared as Loki stood and fixed his collar. Unlike the professional black suit, Loki wore fitted black jeans and a green jumper, with the collar of a black shirt visible.

“I think four hours is up now,” Loki said coldly, and if Stephen had said anything he didn’t hear him.

He merely slipped through a portal, leaving Stephen by himself.

 

* * *

 

_~Present~_

Loki brushed her fingers over the soft fabric of the baby clothes hung up, smiling faintly to herself. By the Norns, she was having a _baby_. With the Sorcerer Supreme of all people. A part of her was terrified. What if she messed up? What if she were a terrible mum? She shook her head, banishing those thoughts. She deserved a future like this. With love and a boyfriend and baby. The clothes were wildly different from what they were in Asgard, even the soft pastel colours were a vast difference from the solid colours she wore as a babe.

“Find anything you like?” Stephen asked, coming up behind her. He wrapped his arms around her, both hands faintly brushing over her bump as if they were the most normal couple in the world.

Not the Sorcerer Supreme and a Norse Goddess.

Deciding that she rather liked the affection from her boyfriend, she stayed in the same spot and dug out a baby-grow from the rack. It was a cream colour, with animal patterns all over it. Loki scrunched her button nose up. “What's with mortals and their obsession with animals on baby things?” She asked.

Stephen chucked. “Animals are cute, babies are cute. When combined? The cutest. Which is why we should definitely get that.”

Loki scowled, shoving it back. “Our baby will be the cutest without all these sappy animal baby-grows,” she said as Stephen grabbed another. It had short sleeves and was striped with a pale yellow and green. Immediately, Loki snatched it off him, grinning happily, her mood changed completely. They were  _her_ colours. Well, hers were green and gold but this was good enough.

“Do you think it’s gender neutral enough, Lokes?”

She inspected it closer, then swung it over her arm as if to say, ‘Mine,’ then turned and looked at Stephen in deadpan. “Darling, I’m a shapeshifting Frost Giant from outer space. Do you really care if our baby wears yellow and green?”

“Fair enough.”

With a satisfied smile, Loki ducked away from Stephen’s grip to another rack.

“New Asgard gets rather cold during the winter. We’ll probably have to stock up on those sleep suits you talked about,” she murmured, gazing at cute little tops.

Stephen’s brows furrowed. “You don’t think that our baby will have your immunity to the cold?” He asked, reaching out to touch a soft royal blue blanket.

Loki shrugged. “Maybe, but their powers might be weak considering they’re only half Jotun. We won’t find out the true extent of their power until they’ve hit puberty.”

“A hormonal teenager also developing our magic? That’ll be fun,” Stephen mused, making Loki giggle. She laughed a lot more, he noticed. Smiled a lot more too. Not the seductive, sensual smile, but the crooked one which made her eyes light up.

“I mean, you already deal with me. I think you’re prepared,” she teased.

“Very true," He said, managing to place a kiss on her lips before she darted away again. 

 

They spent the whole afternoon in that shop, and Stephen had convinced Loki to get that cream baby-grow with the animal patterns on it. She huffed about it and said that their baby’s first teddy would be a snake. He agreed, because he knew that an argument with his pregnant goddess of a girlfriend was pointless and she always won. Including now, after she announced, not asked, that they were going to the ‘wrappy’ place. Even after months on earth, Loki still hadn’t quite grasped onto ‘Earthy things’ as she said. Like burritos.

“You know, I don’t think jalapenos should be eaten as much as you eat them,” Stephen said, receiving a glare from Loki from across the living room of the Sanctum. Smugly, Loki took a slice of the pepper out of the burrito and ate it right in front of him. He winced.

“How can you even eat so many?”

“If I can survive all that I have, dear Strange, then I can eat a few spicy peppers, don’t you think?” she asked.

Just before he was going to bite back, the doors of the Sanctum swung open. 

"Wizard!"

Stephen groaned quietly as Thor walked into the living room, awkwardly standing in front of them until Loki patted the space next to her. He sat, smiling sheepishly at his pregnant sister. 

"How are they?" He asked, glancing at Loki's bump.

"Very well. I've been trying to convince their dear daddy that they enjoy jalapenos," she said, giving Stephen a pointed look.

Thor chuckled, but the smile didn't reach his eyes. Loki didn't notice, too invested in her food, but Stephen did.

"You're not here for a family visit," he said quietly, clasping his hands together on his lap. He sat forward as Thor shook his head. 

"Afraid not. Stark and the Captain sent me, they need you," he said, referring to Stephen.  _That_ got Loki's attention. 

"Why me?"

"Those...green aliens. Stark was able to identify them. They're called Kalgoli-"

"Kalgoli are extinct, brother. Are you sure he's correct?" Loki cut in, looking at Thor in horror. Her brother shook his head.

"Very sure. It seems that father had lied about them being vanquished." As children, Thor and Loki had been brought up listening to stories about their father, the places he conquered and the allies he had made in efforts for peace. Apparently the Kalgoli had been to violent, too hellbent on bloodshed that the Asgardian army had killed them all.  Obviously not if they were attacking New York and repopulating.

Loki looked at the coffee table, deep in thought as Thor continued, "We need your help to find their planet."

"You want another massacre, Thor?" Stephen asked, furrowing his brows. 

The god immediately shook his head. "By the Norns, no. Stark just wants to know where they're coming from, how they're getting to Earth so easily."

"How can you not tell where they're coming from, brother? Surely a planet isn't that hard to find," Loki said.

Thor explained that they had just been...disappearing as soon as they went through a portal. Tony Stark's satellite hadn't been able to pick them up and it seemed that they had been hiding their planet with magic.

"Glamouring a whole planet..." Breathed Loki, "is...intense. That's a lot of magic."

"Which is why we need you too, Loki. You can see through glamours. That'll help..a lot."

Loki grinned as Stephen glared.

"Yes!"

" _No."_


	9. Seeing in a new light.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's so late! The action will be coming very soon :)

_Past_

Loki returned the next day, walking straight past Stephen as he went straight to the library. Huffy asshole. After yesterday, Stephen hadn't been sure that Loki would even show up. Then again, he didn't think the God would want to jeopardise his place on Earth. 

The Sorcerer Supreme ignored him for a few hours, getting some work done before he reluctantly went to the library. He'd have to face Loki sometime.

He found Loki on the floor of the library, wearing a hoodie and loose bottoms. Mortal clothes which he never expected to see Loki wear, but damn he looked adorable. He was surrounded by books, which Stephen guessed was a good place to be. 

"What do you want?" Loki murmured, not looking up from the book he was reading. 

Stephen coughed, then crossed his arms. "I'm surprised you came back."

Loki snorted. "I'm not going to avoid you because of some stupid fight."

"So what are you doing now?"

The God glared up at him, emerald eyes blazing. "I'm hardly avoiding you, we barely speak anyways dumbass," he hissed. Stephen had to admit, that was true. Yesterday had been the only day they truly had a conversation. Strangely...he liked it, but he certainly did not like Loki. He was an enemy, a threat upon Earth, a-

"What do you want?" Loki repeated, his smooth voice cutting through Stephen's thoughts like the sharpest knife. Because that's what Loki was; a knife. If Stephen got closer, he risked colliding with the hilt or the blade. 

Oh. Right. "I...came to make sure that you had everything you need."

"You know that I can manifest anything I like, Stephen," Loki replied in deadpan. 

"And here I thought you enjoyed my tea," the sorcerer joked. 

Loki had actually smiled at that. "I do." 

Stephen took that as a hint.

 

 

A few moments later, both sorcerers were sitting at the main table of the ancient library, books and teacups in front of them both. They were silent, but it was that comfortable silence. The one where Stephen studied Loki's face when he wasn't looking. At the clear, pale skin. The emerald pupils glimmering through long, dark lashes when he looked down. Soft curls of hair which actually sat nicely when Loki washed it and didn't coat it in a litre of gel. 

Okay,  _woah._ He had to stop staring. What the hell had gotten into him?

He let his eyes wander around Loki's face a few moments longer, only looking away when he found Loki gazing at him too.

"What are you reading?" Stephen asked, breaking the silence.

"Some book on illusions. Aren't you meant to be working? What do you even  _do_ _?_ _"_

He shrugged. "I finished the paperwork for today, and I protect-"

"Yeah yeah, you protect reality and all that. What else?"

Stephen stared at him, wondering if Loki was having a dig at him or was genuinely curious. 

"Did The Ancient One never tell you?" He replied, leaning back at his chair. 

Loki took a sip of tea, stroking the side of the cup with gentle fingers. "I always asked, but she never replied. Her...your...job seems so serious."

"Well..it is, I guess." If you told Stephen he'd have this job two years ago he probably would have laughed. Even now Stephen thought about it and questioned what the hell he was doing. Still, it was something he'd never regret. Neurology had been his dream ever since his sister, Donna, had died...but this seemed so much more worth while. 

Would he go back to his old life if he could?

"Let me show you something," Stephen said, standing up. 

Loki followed him through the halls of the Sanctum, through large doors that lead to a huge...globe. It glowed orange, and on it was markings of different countries and oceans. Each Sanctum was marked too, Loki realised. His eyes widened in wonder as he gazed at the glowing thing before them.

"When a source of magic is picked up, it glows red on his globe. It's mainly how I can tell if there is a threat on Earth," Stephen explained. 

"This is how you found me, then," Loki said, remembering falling into a portal in the middle of New York. 

Stephen smiled faintly at the memory. "Yes."

He let Loki inspect it closer, with such a curious expression it seemed to make Stephen's chest ache.

He was in such deep shit.

 

_Present_

 

“You’re insane if you think that I’m going to let you go out there, Loki, especially pregnant.”

Loki scowled. “It is not your decision, and fortunately I’m already insane. Do not dare try and control me.” As soon as Thor sheepishly left the Sanctum, Loki and Stephen began to fight about her position in the mission. No way in hell would he risk Loki's and the baby's life over this mission. Especially not when they'd be going into space. Stephen pressed his forefinger and thumb to the bridge of his nose for a few moments, struggling to remain calm. It wasn’t _his_ fault he was so overprotective of his lover, the mother of his child. The thought of her getting hurt was enough to make Stephen feel nauseous.

“I’m not trying to control you. I just…” He sighed, “I worry for your safety when you’re in a dangerous situation-”

“And when was the last time I was in a dangerous situation, dear Stephen? Oh yes, months ago. Ragnarok. It’s been that long, so do not give me that bullshit about my safety. I’ve been able to survive on this Earth far longer than you have,” she snapped.

“What is this about, then? You were never the type to be a hero, to put yourself into so much danger, especially when they aren’t even _your_ people,” Stephen replied. He had been shocked at just how quick Loki was to agree to Thor’s offer.

Loki shook her head, perching on the armrest of the sofa. “Maybe I’m just bored,” she replied.

“If you were bored you’d go to New Asgard, you’d-” Stephen sighed once more. “Tell me the truth.” He walked over, nudging her legs apart so he could stand between them.

Loki looked up, not liking how much she had to actually look up to see the man. “They don’t trust me,” she murmured, “The Avengers. At every party and event I cling onto you and Thor and Wanda like some...outsider. For once in my life I want to be trusted and not seen as the weak God who worked for The Mad Titan.” He laid his scarred hands on her thighs, stroking them as she spoke.

“There are other ways to gain their trust, Loki,” he said softly.

“Is there? I don’t see any other way, Stephen. Besides, these aliens are nasty things. Only Thor and I know information about them. Valuable information. My people are here on this Earth too, you know, and you.” She quietly gripped his hand, placing it on her stomach. “Our future is here. I’m not losing my second home too.” She had once asked for a seat to watch Asgard burn from, but seeing it explode was...hard, but she’d never admit that. Ever.

Stephen sighed quietly, and Loki gazed at his face as he thought. “Fine,” he eventually said, standing up. His voice was too neutral for Loki to feel comfortable.

Loki watched as he walked away, leaving her alone in the living room.

 

* * *

 

 

Wanda was training in the hall when Loki walked into the room, glamoured in his male body. She watched through hazel eyes as he wrapped bandages around his pale hands, either ignoring her or he simply hadn’t noticed that she was in the room too. Loki had gone over to the punching bags. Huh. Wanda quickly inspected the damage she had made onto the target moments before he came in, then made her way over.

“Something happen?” She greeted, but didn’t stand too close. He stopped punching, shaking his hands as he gazed at her.

“No. What makes you think that something happened?” He asked, perhaps more defensive than usual. Wanda crossed her arms over her chest.

“It’s kinda obvious.”

Loki sighed quietly. “He’s too protective and it's driving me insane. More insane than I already am."

Wanda snorted softly. “You’re his boyfriend. His pregnant boyfriend. Of course he’s going to be protective,” she said, receiving a groan from Loki. 

He shook his head, dismissing the topic. The small fight with Stephen was just going to build up into something more serious if they didn't talk about it. "Are you coming on the mission too?" He asked.

Wanda nodded, folding bare arms across her chest. "Yup. I was able to turn groups of the Kalgoli into a puddle of green. I think that's kinda needed where we are," She replied. giving him a small smile. "As for Stephen..." 

Loki sighed and continued to beat the ever-loving hell out of the punching bag. 

"You should talk to him. Not that you need anyone," appealing to his large ego, nice, "but you won't be alone. I think Stark is trying to get Carol to join too. He trusts you, Loki."

He stopped, brushing a curl away from his eyes. "I know," I said quietly. Moments past whilst he got some water from the dispenser on the other side of the room, but he returned with a grin. 

"Is Natasha coming?"

"Shut up!"

* * *

 

 

When Loki returned to the Sanctum he was alone, until mirror-like crystals formed mid air and Stephen appeared. Practising his magic, perhaps. 

"About earlier-" He began, but Loki stopped him. 

"You're protective over me, I get it," he started, slowly walking over. He clasped Stephen's hands in his, giving them a small squeeze. Subtly, his magic worked to dull the chronic pain; at least for a few hours. He knew Stephen's hands got sore after training. "But you must trust me. I'm doing this for our future's benefit."

Stephen sighed quietly. "I trust you, Loki," he replied, giving him a little nod. Perhaps this wouldn't be the last time they'd have a disagreement about Loki's involvement in a mission, but Loki accepted that and gave his lover a smile. 

"You know, the baby told me that they would  _really_ love one of those fancy hot chocolates you make before we go to this dumb Avenger's meeting," He mused. It was a meeting to discuss when and how they'd be getting up to space. Knowing Loki, he'd either chat with Wanda the whole time or fall asleep.

Stephen quirked a brow. "The baby told you, huh?"

"Yup."

The sorcerer playfully rolled his eyes, but gave Loki a kiss before he went into the kitchen. 

 

They ended up making love on the kitchen table, making them late for the Avenger's meeting, but that's besides the point.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Someone To Stay by the Vancouver Sleep Clinic reminds me of Strangefrost- you should give it a listen!
> 
> Also I'm working on making my chapters longer, wish me luck :')


	10. Everything went black.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And suddenly the lights on the ship went out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next part of their past will be added onto the next chapter; I'll be long to make up for the lack of in this one. Sorry!
> 
> The chapter before everything happens :)  
> Relish in the happiness whilst it lasts, folks.

“How is this going to go, then?”

“Glad you asked, Banner,” Tony Stark said, then tapped twice on the face of the watch on his wrist. On the table in front of them illuminated a blue hologram. A map of the known places of space, both Loki and Thor recognised. They looked at each other once, as if remembering what happened the last time they were there, then back down at the table as Stark explained.

Usually meetings were boring, but this one had peaked Loki’s interest. The Kalgoli were thought to be extinct, Odin himself had said so. Has they returned or had he lied? To be fair, she wouldn't be surprised if her father had lied. Wouldn't be the first time. She stayed silent, her slim hand resting on her bump. It was bigger now, and seemingly was the reason for her indigestion. Not to mention the backaches, but that was simply an excuse to receive a massage from her dear doctor boyfriend. The only time she'd actually let him be like her doctor.

“Thor, Stephen, Loki and I will head up there. Maybe Wanda too,” Loki saw the witch perk up in intrigue, “If there’s an illusion around their planet Loki will see through it and we will be able to tell where they’re coming from,” Tony said, and on the hologram an arrow pointed from Earth to where they roughly thought the Kalgoli came from. Not too far away, which made sense considering how quick they got to Earth.

“Then what?” Stephen asked. Under the table, his hand slipped to Loki’s thigh. She relaxed slightly, but the crease between her brows remained. Stephen wished he could just smooth it out.

“Uh…” Tony touched over his brows.

“Let me guess. You haven’t gotten that far?” Stephen replied in deadpan.

“No, I’ve been too busy helping out with the ship. You know, that big flying thing that’ll get our asses up there?”

“You are bringing us to space...without a plan?

“I didn’t say _that_ , Wizard.”

“Well it sounds like you did.”

“Ladies! You’re both pretty, now can we get on with the meeting?” Loki breathed, resulting in an eruption of Avengers trying to contain their laughter. The god actually smiled, as if pleased he could get such a positive reaction from them. Acceptance hadn't came fully, but in small chunks. After all she had done on Earth, she let them take their time in trusting her.

“Right. Yes,” Tony said, shooting Stephen a glance before he continued. “Banner and Captain Star Spangled here will remain here, because we all know they’re pussies in space. They will keep in contact and let us know if there are any threats within the hemisphere, and Banner will be ready to experiment on whatever residue we can get from the Kalgoli planet.”

Steve and Bruce nodded, and a few other discussions occurred before Tony wrapped it up, the hologram on the table disappearing. “Okay, I think that does it. If you have any questions I’m sure you’ll come up with the answers by yourself. As for the five joining me, I will meet you back here in three days,” He said, then collected a few things before he left the room. Perhaps in a rush to get back to his daughter and wife.

Avengers began to gather out of the room, but Stephen and Loki didn’t move until the room was empty. They returned to the Sanctum through a sparkling portal, with Loki immediately collapsing on the sofa as soon as they arrived. The sorcerer unfastened Levi, letting the cloak float around the house. Eventually, he sat next to Loki, smiling faintly when she laid her legs over his lap. Stephen stroked her calves, mulling over everything that was discussed during the meeting.

“Are you sure I can’t convince you to stay here?” Stephen said, breaking moments of silence. He frowned as he gazed at his pregnant lover. Loki shook her head, trailing her fingers over the laces of Stephen’s tunic. She slid her fingers through the gap between two buttons on his tunic, stroking the naked skin. He relaxed against the touch.

“No, they need me.” _And I need to prove myself._

“I’ll make you endless hot chocolates if you stay?”

“You _already_ make me hot chocolates when I ask you too, besides, this isn’t much of a dangerous mission. We will get home safe and sound, we will go to that scan next week and everything will be okay,” she assured him, reaching up to cup his jaw with her free hand.

They traded a few soft kisses and touches before Stephen spoke. He seemed satisfied enough, but Loki feared that worry still ate away at his heart. Honestly, she was a little nervous too, but wouldn’t admit it to anyone.

“You know, when I became Sorcerer Supreme, I didn’t think I’d get this,” he murmured, changing the subject completely as they followed each other upstairs. It grew late, and they had dinner before the meeting. Loki dragged him into their shared bedroom, closing the door over before she began to strip. Because it was more ‘comfortable,’ she had taken to just wearing Stephen’s shirts to bed.

He didn’t complain.

“Get what?”

“This. You, a baby…” He knelt in front of her, placing his hands on her bump. “Love,” he added sheepishly, giving her the softest look he could muster. A look only she got. She looked at him for a moment, then sighed and put her hands on top of his.

“Neither, Stephen Strange,” she mused. Being in love felt weird and weak and amazing at the same time. She showed Stephen her most vulnerable parts and he accepted them without judgement. Her mind went back to when she showed him her Jotun side, how damn accepting he was. It completely terrified her. Never had Loki seen such a positive reaction to her true self before. One day he will see that blue side of her again, but for now she was happy to ignore it for as long as she could.

She dragged Stephen onto the bed with all strength her female form had. He laughed, watching as the female took off his clothes with thin, delicate fingers. Once clad in those usual black boxers, Loki hauled him down onto the bed. They spend a few moments in silence, getting comfortable and twining limbs together; their usual routine at night.

Stephen’s body was warm, Loki’s was warm. The perfect equilibrium.

“Mh, how many weeks now?” Stephen asked, fingers seeking out the bump of their baby. Still small, but growing every day.

“Fifteen, my love,” Loki murmured, watching the sorcerer slide the shirt up over her stomach so he could see the bare skin.

“Symptoms?”

Loki gave him a look, then sighed and looked up at the ceiling. The doctor was definitely still in him, there was no doubt about that.

“Uh...some headaches, a little dizziness…”

“Remember to walk around, because circulation-”

“Yep, I know,” she replied, giving him a quirked brow.

“Are you my boyfriend or doctor, hm?”

“Can’t I be both?”

“Um. No.”

“Why?”

“Because I said so.”

“And Loki’s word is final?”

“Yup.”

Good, he was finally learning.

 

* * *

 

 

Three days later, Loki boarded the ship, brushing her fingers over the fancy interior of it. The last time she had been in an Avenger’s ship...she shook her head internally and continued walking, followed by the Sorcerer Supreme and The Scarlet Witch. They were all equipped in their ‘fancy gear,’ as Tony Stark called it. He had called the trio The Powerpuff Girls, whatever they were.

She wore the feminine version of her leather suit, happy to wear something that reminded her of Asgard. It also accommodated her bump quite well, but she had magically added extra padding around her stomach just in case. And extra knives in her invisible pocket. And a protection spell around her body too, thanks to the Sorcerer Supreme.

“You guys ready? There’s a bucket if you need to puke, Reindeer Games,” Stark asked, pressing random buttons Loki didn’t know at the front of the ship. Thor strapped himself next to Tony at the front, gripping Stormbreaker in his hands afterwards. The three sorcerers were in the back, on chairs against the wall.

“Thanks, Stark.” She would have given a snarky reply back if she didn’t already feel sick. If only she knew if it were nerves or the baby. No, it was definitely the baby. _Loki Laufeyson_ didn’t get nervous.

Loki sucked in a breath as she sat in between Stephen and Wanda, wondering if a fight would break out between them and the gross green aliens. With one of the smartest men on Earth, two gods and two sorcerers...surely everything would be under control? Usually she would have been cocky, smug, knowing she could beat anything...but it was no longer just her life in her protection.

With that in her mind, she strapped herself up on the chair, noticing how Wanda did the same. She was the only one from the six of them who hadn’t been to space. Her face looked pale, so Loki gently slid her hand into hers. It wasn’t long before the ship’s doors closed and they took off. Wanda closed her eyes as they reached the Earth’s hemisphere, going faster and faster until the ship seemed to slow down. Loki jerked her chin up, gazing out the window. Darkness surrounded them, but soon twinkles of stars appeared. Stephen stayed silent, looking at the ground, but Thor had undone his belt and stood, scanning the large window in front of him. Tony had gone into auto-pilot and was studying some notes Loki and Thor had been able to produce on the Kalgoli.

Surprisingly, Wanda had unbuckled herself and stood, walking over to the window on the side. She touched it, as if she could reach for the stars themselves. “Woah,” she murmured, entranced. It was strange to see the witch so fascinated with stars. Loki had been brought up among the stars, it was like the humans being curious about the ground beneath their very feet. Still, she watched Wanda as she gazed at the different colours of galaxies and stars.

Everything went by normally for a while, with short discussions made between them all. Stephen had remained completely silent, not speaking to any of them. Loki didn’t force him to speak, instead reading some book she had brought. Though, he had to know that she'd talk to him later. Perhaps he wasn't completely over what happened with Dormammu. 

Maybe it should have been Loki convincing Stephen not to come. She didn't want his demons coming back.

The normalcy -could it be called that?- lasted for a short while.

Loki stilled as she felt a faint brush of magic against her own, and suddenly the lights on the ship went out.


	11. He wasn't afraid anymore.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Kalgoli are gross creatures, take my word for it.

Before panic could arise, the lights flickered back on. Wanda looked between the men, but Loki was gazing out of the large window at the nose of the ship. She would have felt comforted by the sight of the stars if they were here under better circumstances.

“I sense magic,” she breathed, then turned and gazed at them. Stephen, out of whatever trance he had been, stood and went over to Loki. He gripped his hands in hers, giving them a squeeze of reassurance. Thor and Tony exchanged a glance.

“Think it’s them, reindeer games?” Tony asked, peeking over the driver's chair. Loki nodded, furrowing her brows in thought; as if she were opening her mind out to the space outside.

“I think it’s them.”

Tony Stark nodded, then quickly took control of the ship as they landed upon the Earth.

"Did Odin ever mention what their environment was like?" Tony asked, looking between the Asgardian siblings.  

Thor and Loki glanced at each other, as if trying to share memories of their childhood.

"No," Loki murmured.

"But he was happy to tell us what it looked like after they were all killed," Thor added, then gripped onto Stormbreaker as the ship doors opened.

He was the first to walk off, exploring the area around him. When it was all clear he motioned for the others to join. They did.

“The air...it’s breathable,” Wanda said, obviously bracing for the feeling of being unable to breathe as she stepped off the ship. Instead, the air was as clean as it was on Earth. Perhaps clearer. It was strange, unlike anything Wanda had seen before.

“Now we know why they can be on Earth for so long,” Tony said, his voice different through the mask. He scanned the ground as he walked, letting F.R.I.D.A.Y pick up every single detail she could of the habitat. It was filled with greens as deep as the Kalgoli themselves. Plants sprouted to life everywhere, making Loki wonder why they’d even want to come to Earth in the first place when their own country was so prosperous. Did they somehow recognise Thor and Loki? Did they seek revenge? If so...great. Another problem Odin caused and fucked off before he could face the consequences. As per usual.

The ground squelched under Loki and Thor's feet as they walked behind the others, through the moss, still looking around them in bewilderment. 

"Do you think father lied about killing them, Thor?" Loki asked, furrowing her dark brows slightly. Their planet didn't look harmed at all. He wouldn't be surprised if Odin had lied just to fill his own large ego.

"Perhaps, or this is a new planet entirely. I just wonder how they suddenly exist again."

"Some could have escaped?" Loki offered. 

"Most likely. They could have- oop!"

Thor bumped into Stephen, who turned around and scowled, a finger to his lips as if to say 'shut up.'

The God of Thunder would have argued back with his future brother-in-law if he didn't see the group of Kalgoli approaching. 

They were an ugly shade of green, with webbed hands and scales all over their body. Like a hybrid between a frog and a fish...if a frog and a fish could walk on two feet, of course.  

 

A fight broke out immediately, with the Kalgoli releasing piercing shrieks. Six against...what? A few dozen Kalgoli? Stephen didn’t quite have time to count them, far too busy trying to turn them into puddles on the ground. Disgusting squelches of exploding Kalgoli, the cry of Tony’s suit shooting and the whistle of magic filled the air, but when Stephen heard a scream he suddenly turned around. Loki. She was huddled on the ground, covering her head with her arms. Wanda had quickly exploded the Kalgoli responsible as Stephen rushed over, trying to make Loki sit up straight.

“Where is hurt? Loki talk to me,” he demanded, but she merely whimpered under his grip; something not like the goddess.

“That...thing touched her, Stephen, and she just screamed,” Wanda said, worry lacing her tone. She sounded exhausted. The other two surrounded Loki and Dr Strange, protecting them whilst they could not protect themselves. Stephen noticed the worry in Thor’s eyes, but still he continued fighting.

“Loki,” Stephen repeated urgently, then pressed her against his body. His magic immediately sensed physical wounds, but he was more caught up on her mentality.

She screamed again.

 

* * *

 

 

_He was suddenly on the bifrost again, clutching onto the handle of Thor’s hammer. His brother pleaded for him, but those two words from Odin had him letting go of the hammer. Letting himself fall into the abyss of darkness._

_No, Loki._

_He wasn’t enough. Wouldn’t ever be enough. So what was the point in continuing to live in Thor’s shadow? He was nothing, especially now as he fell into the darkness. His senses drowned out. If he screamed, nobody would hear him. Nobody would save him, but he didn't want that anyways. The drop felt like forever, but when his body hit the ground, the darkness came again, filling his senses with a numbness._

_It was a sweet relief. He wasn’t afraid anymore._

 

_Not until The Mad Titan found him. How Loki was resurrected, he didn’t know, but he remembered suddenly waking up, the air feeling cold in his lungs as he struggled for a breath. It wasn't too bad at first. He trained for the Man Titan and his children, watched in horror as Thanos massacred half of each planet they came across. Loki hadn’t agreed with his method of complete madness, but never said it aloud._

_Thanos had made Loki feel wanted, needed. That was good enough for him...until Thanos asked Loki to take over Earth using two stones; The Mind and Power. A simple task when he had an army of the Chitauri at his back, but not one he wanted to take on. Becoming like the Mad Titan or his own father wasn’t what he wanted, so he said no._

_A big mistake. One of the biggest he had ever made in his life._

_The pain of torture was overwhelming, he actually blacked out a few times. It was nothing like Loki had ever felt before, every single cell in his body seemed to scream as he laid in a cell, his whereabouts unknown. Loki had been left alone in that cell for three days, as if Thanos was seeing if Loki was strong enough to survive._

_Once Chitauri had hauled him out of the cell and dumped him in front of Thanos, the question had been asked yet again._

_He said yes. Was given the Tesseract and a plan of action._

_How many had he killed in the attack against New York?_

 

 

Before more memories could be recollected, Loki heard her name in a voice that she recognised, felt hands on her as she was pulled closer to a warm body. She clung to it, ignoring her pride as she sobbed against the body. 

* * *

 

 

The trip back was hazy and a blur for Loki. She didn't know what had happened once that Kalgoli had touched her forehead, everything seemed to go fuzzy as she was forced to go through her worst memories again. Stephen had carried her into one of the small bedrooms in the ship as soon as they boarded, healing cuts around her body whilst sporting his own. She had murmured that she wanted to heal him too, but he ignored her. Usually she would have been annoyed, but right now she couldn’t even think straight, never mind use her own magic. Being so weak felt gross. How had they been able to get to her so easily? She blamed it on the baby, and the fact she hadn't been training as much now. Never again would she be caught out by some weird, green...things. It was a pretty big blow to her ego, one of which she would never tell to anyone.

Wincing, Stephen tugged her onto his lap, and they simply sat there, holding one another as if it were the end of the world.

For them, it had felt like it.

“Next time,” Loki croaked, “I’ll just stay at home with hot chocolate.”

Stephen actually managed to chuckle quietly, but the smile didn't reach his eyes like they usually did. "There will be no next time, Loki. This mission was stupid and reckless," he said, irritated at nobody specific. Perhaps himself, actually. Stephen Strange had a habit of blaming himself for everything.

"At least we found out where they were," she said quietly, gazing down at the bed sheets.

He sighed quietly, then buried his face in his hands. "What did they do to your mind?" He asked eventually.

Loki debated telling him, for he already knew what happened with Thanos, but instead she shook her head. "Another time, I'm tired," she replied, trying to tug him down onto the bed. He didn't resist, letting her lay him down. He also didn't resist sleep when it came, but only when Loki was faintly snoring against his chest.

 

Loki woke when she briefly felt a spell against her body and began to panic, gripping Stephen’s torn tunic in a frenzy. He was already awake, gazing at her. “They’re back!” She screeched, clawing at his chest before he grabbed her hands in his shaking ones.

“Love, it’s me. _My_ magic. A healing spell for you and a protective one for the baby,” he breathed, clutching her close. He had never heard Loki scream as she did earlier, she had never cried so hard or held him as tight before. She seemed to accept that, sighing as she pressed her forehead to his collarbone. Waking up unpleasantly was one of the worst things in her eyes.

"Did you check the baby? Are they okay?" Loki asked, more panic lacing her voice.

"They're okay, I promise," he whispered, kissing the top of her head. Earlier, the baby was the first thing his magic had sensed. His concern for their babe faded when he thankfully found them perfectly fine. Loki looked satisfied, but she turned onto her back, clutching onto her stomach. What would she have done if something happened to their baby? Years ago, children wasn't even on her mind, but now she wanted a future with Stephen and their child more than anything.

"Okay," Loki murmured, giving him a faint smile. It didn't stop her from looking forward to their scan later on in the week, so she could see for herself that their baby was fine.

 

* * *

 

 

“Mental and memory manipulation was not on the list of things I thought the Kalgoli could do,” Tony said, his voice laced with regret, “Is she okay? The baby?”

Stephen stared over at the bedroom entrance, where Loki was sleeping. Wanda had sneaked in after Stephen had left, both to keep Loki company and to sleep herself.  “Yeah,” He rasped, “both her and the baby are okay.” He hoped that Loki was truly okay and not hiding anything from him. Stephen adored his girlfriend, but damn was she stubborn.

Tony nodded, sighing as he sat down, covering his face with his hands. 

“It wasn’t your fault, Stark.”

“Yeah, well I’m the one who brought us up here. They had never used mental manipulation when on Earth. It was as if they wanted us to bring Thor and Loki to them," he replied, as if cursing his own stupidity. He was as self-hateful as Loki was stubborn.

"You didn't know. None of us knew," Stephen said, looking over at Thor too, just in case he decided to blame himself too. He was hunched over on the chair where Loki had sat earlier, looking as tired as Stephen felt himself despite the nap. It was obvious that Thor wished it was him instead and not Loki.

"What next?" The god asked quietly. It was no secret that they had not killed all of the Kalgoli, and that they would possibly come back to earth with a stronger force. The aliens intentions were still no longer clear, but at least they knew now that Loki and Thor were targets. They would be better prepared next time.

"Honestly? I don't know," Tony replied. Stephen guessed that he was more intent on getting home to his wife and child, but the danger wasn't gone. Perhaps they had heightened it, but it wouldn't stop them from fighting. "We will talk it over with the others when we get home, but for now rest. I'll get us back."

"I can do it, you rest," Thor said, standing up.

"No, you rest. I'll be fine." 

In the end a triumphant Tony won, and Stephen and Thor had each gone into the other two small bedrooms in the ship.

 

* * *

 

 

“You were quiet earlier, when we took off. Why?” Loki asked, unable to get that out of his mind. He gazed up at Stephen, who was pacing the bedroom. They had been home for a few hours now, and as soon as they landed Stephen had practically dragged Loki back to the Sanctum through a portal. Thor had joined Tony back at the Avengers compound, but had promised to call in later on that day. Wanda had been hauled away by Natasha Romanoff, protectiveness plastered over her face.

Loki was on bed rest now, and had shifted into his male form for strength. It felt strange not to have a small bump.

“Nothing. Just thinking.” The duvet rustled quietly as Loki sat up, leaning back on his hands. They were in their bedroom.

“About what, Stephen?” He asked. They had made a promise to each other to try and open up more. It was harder for Loki, but now Stephen seemed to be struggling.

And then it clicked.

“The last time you were in space-”

“Dormammu. Yes, Loki,” Stephen replied, wincing as he sat on the edge of the bed. He was getting too old for this. Loki would have tackled him onto the bed for a hug if they weren’t both achy and full of cuts and bruises. Instead, Loki stared at him, silently waiting to see if Stephen would expand. Eventually he did, reaching forward to cup Loki’s cheek with one hand. The god found himself tilting his head into Stephen’s touch, allowing them both a moment of sweet comfort.

“I try not to think about it, but going back up there just reminded me of those thousands of times I died. It was as if I could physically feel it."

"Same," Loki admitted, "with the Kalgoli. It made me remember what happened when I fell."

Stephen sighed quietly, placing a kiss on Loki's head. The god surprisingly accepted it.

"I'm sorry that happened-"

"Don't. I meant it when I said I didn't want your pity. What happened happened, and you couldn't have changed that," Loki insisted.

"Then you better not apologise for what happened with Dormammu."

"I wasn't gonna. Apologising isn't in my nature, Strange. I was going to hold you until you no longer felt upset," Loki replied quietly. Initiating affection was usually unlike Loki, but recently he had been rather clingy. He blamed it on the baby.

"Sounds better than an apology, Lokes."

"Then get your ass over here." 

Stephen smiled faintly and took Loki in his arms, laying him down onto the bed. Their limbs tangled, and once again Loki felt relaxed. Perhaps it was a weakness that a mortal could make him feel this way, but he selfishly didn't care. 

Happiness felt good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the lack of the past scenes, I just wanted to focus on the present plot!
> 
> Comments would be appreciated, thank you for reading!  
> \- Nat

**Author's Note:**

> In this fic, Thor and Loki managed to get to Earth and build a New Asgard, Thanos was defeated and none of the Avengers died.
> 
> Hope you enjoy & comments will always be appreciated! :)


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